#325 - British Actor Jason Riddington's First Interview About His NDE

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I had intense fear and panic because we were obviously crashing. Out of my heart came the

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thought, oh god help, I'm going to die.

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From the time that they pronounced me dead was a good 45 minutes.

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It's determined that I was not breathing for 20 minutes.

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They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped. And I could

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see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realise that was actually my physical body

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because I was somewhere else.

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By which you went to the past far, in the afternoon, by half past seven I was dead, clinically

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dead, four minutes.

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And they were crying because I was dead and I was trying to tell them no, I'm not dead,

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I'm just fine, I'm okay.

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I was greeted by people I'd known in the past.

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I started to feel like I was surrounded by all this warm, loving, beautiful, soothing,

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loving energy.

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I'm back with God again. I just felt this all in my two breath of these, like, wow,

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I'm back.

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I'm back home again.

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Incredibly safe and felt at home. I'd come back home. It was a very strong feeling that

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I've come back home.

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The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't

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anything else to be felt.

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And light is literally emitting from him. And I could feel that that tremendous amount

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of love was coming through him as well.

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They were brighter than everybody else. And I just knew who they were.

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Welcome to Roundtrip Death, everybody. And I'd like to welcome to the show today a very

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special guest because we don't get celebrities very often.

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Jason Rittington from Buckinghamshire in England. Oh, I hope I said that close.

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Absolutely fine. Yeah, it's like Buckingham without the palace and then Shaw. Yeah, I'm

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looking at Shaw.

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Okay. Believe me, you're allowed to correct my American accent. It is.

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No, no, no, I wouldn't dream of it. I wouldn't dream of it.

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No offense here. For those that don't know Jason, I'm going to just read a couple of

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things from his resume. It is long, long, long, long. He has been doing all kinds of

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acting for years. You may have seen him in films like Death of an Author, Once Upon

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a Time in London, Lucid, Motherhood, Weathering Heights, King Lear on TV, and things like

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Doctors, EastEnders, Luther on stage, etc., etc. Jason, wow, it's an honor.

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It's an honor to meet you. It really is. Thank you for having me on your show.

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Now, of those things that I mentioned, do you happen to have any favorites?

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I guess, yeah, Wuthering Heights would be probably my favorite for a few reasons. The

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first is that was my first ever kind of gig. I was acting with Ray Fiennes and Juliet Benoche.

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Juliet Benoche was really established even back then. I was kind of like, oh my goodness

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me. I was kind of just given a real consumer lesson in film acting from Juliet Benoche.

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It was also the time that I learned to ride. Riding is a really big part of my life. I

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actually have a horse in common with Kevin Costner because I rode this white stallion

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called Chico in Wuthering Heights. I was told to ride on Chico in Wuthering Heights by the

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stunt coordinator, the riding stunt coordinator, Steve Dent. Steve had just finished filming

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Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves with Kevin Costner. If you know the bit where my friend Brian

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blesses in that movie with him as well, which is weird, but anyway, there's a bit where

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he jumps on the back of this white horse, wax it with his sword, and then gallops off.

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Well, that's Chico. I'm like, yay.

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Wow. I like that. Do you want to tell us anything about who Jason really is, where you came

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from, what you do when you're not acting?

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You know, that's a hard question in a way because since my brain injury, that's a tough

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one to really answer. I mean, I don't know about me and an acting now. I guess that's

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why I've kind of gone full bell into the writing side of things because it's a creative outlet

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and it allows me to have that kind of self-expression. But I struggled with so many things since

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my brain injury.

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All right. We're going to dive deeper into that in just a minute as a lead up to your

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NDE. But let me tease your book right now. It's called Life, Death, Tai Chi, and Me.

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And I think we're going to find out why in the next few minutes.

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Yeah.

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Okay. So tell us a little bit about what happened leading up to your near-death experience.

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Did you have any indication before the actual day of?

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Well, yes, I did, but I didn't think I had. I had basically, I'd been out cycling and

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I've done lots of cycling in my life and I'd done lots of cycling up big mountains in

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France. And I'd kind of had altitude sickness before from doing that kind of training. So

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I was like, I thought that when I did this bit of cycling at home and I got this really

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terrible headache and I was sick and all the rest of it, I thought, it's altitude sickness.

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I'm fine. So if anybody's listening and that happens to you, oh, too, you are. Straight

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away. It might be that it's altitude sickness, but equally, those are the telltale signs

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of a brain hemorrhage that has ruptured. So there were signs, but unbeknown to me.

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I cycle up a few mountains myself. I live in the mountains here in Utah. And I always feel

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lousy at the top of a mountain. It's hard work. So what's the difference?

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Tell me about it. Look, I went up this hill that we've got here called White Lip, right?

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Now, if you've cycled up mountains or you follow the tour or whatever, I used to have

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an apartment on the Colder Beesk. So I used to do the Colder Beesk, the Colder Salaw,

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the Colder Maribelon, Colder Port-A-Lay, all in one hit. So for me, going up a big climb

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in inverted commas in Buckinghamshire is kind of like nothing for someone who's done that

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kind of cycling. Right. It's a little hill. How much vertical

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is it? I couldn't say. It's nothing like the kind of ramp up that you get. Well, no, it

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is. It's as steep as that, but it's just short, really, really short in comparison to a big

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climb like the obese called the Port-A-Lay or something like that.

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And knowing it's short, I'm guessing you push real hard.

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Listen, I used to go up and down it five, 10 times just for training.

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Yeah, you don't have to pace yourself. So just push and next thing you know, you've got a

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great high intensity workout under your belt.

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Absolutely. And that was what I was going to go and do. I kind of hit the gradient and

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then I was, and this sounds sexist and it isn't sexist at all, but I was overtaken by a lady

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rider who asked me what happens. I hate when that happens.

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She asked me if I was okay and I was like, yeah, yeah, no, I'm fine. You know what I

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mean? I was like, just going for this. I was thinking, what is, what's going on? What's

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the matter? And I kind of felt okay. And then when I got to the top, I just, I really obviously

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didn't look okay because people were saying, are you okay? And I was like, yeah, I'm fine.

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I think, you know, my, my ego got the better. You know, I was like, yeah, no, no, I'm fine,

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fine. So I took off down the slope, got to the bottom of it. And that's when I started,

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did this horrendous headache and started throwing up. And I was like, okay, is, you know, I'm

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just, I'm just not very well. That's why I couldn't do the climb very well. I'm just

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not very well. My wife's a show jumper. So we've got horses, you know, so I was like,

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I need to go and sort the boys out. So I went to the stables and I kind of fed the horses.

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And again, I was, you know, it was, I felt ill, but I wasn't kind of like stopped in

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my tracks ill. And I thought, okay, well, it's flat. I'll just, I'll just cycle back home

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gently. And then, you know, take myself off to bed and try and try and get better. So

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I did that. And I kind of felt a bit better. And then the rest is kind of murky phase,

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the one that really knows the time scales of things. Apparently I, I, I took Phoebe

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to school and drove back. And this isn't because I was, I was not in the right state to drive.

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This is because I can't remember things clearly after the brain.

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And it's okay to fill in with what Faye told you happened.

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Well, she told me so I drove, so I drove Phoebe, Phoebe back, I came home, got out the car

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and I, and I seemed completely fine. And then the next thing she heard was like a thud.

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And then apparently I'd kind of collapsed on the floor. I'd hit my lip on the, on the

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radiator. And I was out called she did CPR. Bless her the second time in her life that

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she's had to do this. She did that. She had a partner who she had to do this with and

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he didn't make it, you know. So she did CPR called the emergency services. And apparently

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everybody arrived like air ambulance, everyone gave me an adrenaline shot, put me into some

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kind of recovery. And then I was on my way to the hospital. And they put me in an induced

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coma to wait for, I think it was at the weekend. So they wanted to make sure they had their

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surgeons. They obviously stabilized me and everything. So they wanted to make sure that

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they had their surgeons to deal with what they knew was a burst aneurysm. And, and you

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know, I have no memory of it. That's all. It's, it's kind of insane really.

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But you do have some memory, I believe of what happened in, was it in surgery or after where

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you felt like you left your body? I didn't feel like I left my body and I have no idea

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when it, whether it was in surgery or after, you know, I have no idea of what was actually

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happening to me at the time. I just know that the experience that, that I had was, was very

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visceral was like being in a, in a, in a place for an indeterminate kind of amount of time.

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And there was no sensation of leaving my body or of, or of, or of being different to me.

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So did this feel like just a regular dream or somehow different?

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No, it was completely different because the first thing that was different was at the

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start of it. Have you, have you ever had the, the falling dream?

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Yes.

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Okay. So you know, in the falling dream, you wake up and you've got that feeling in the

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pit of your stomach. Yeah.

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So I had the falling dream four times in rapid succession. And then I had this feeling in

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the pit of my stomach. So the main sensation that I had was that feeling, the feeling of,

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of, I've, I've just fallen. But unlike the dream, I was there. Next to me was to begin

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with it was black all around me. Then it was kind of an, aic sort of white. And then I

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somehow was looking to my side, but also above at the same time. And don't ask me how, but

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that's kind of what the, what the visual image was. I wasn't seeing myself. I was literally

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seeing through my eyes. It was happening to me. So I wasn't witnessing anything other

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than I was, I was experiencing it. And then the person entity that was next to me was,

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was kind of almost sort of cheerfully comic in the most surreal and bizarre way. Because

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he had on this kind of, it's like, if you, if you were going to go to a fantasy dress

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costume and you thought, well, I'm going to dress like a crow. And I'm going to look

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like Robert Smith from the cure underneath this crow's outfit. That's kind of what you'd

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look like, which sounds ridiculous. But there he was lying there. And I could see all the

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details of like the little feathers on the, on the beak, because the beak had kind of

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feathers to it. It wasn't a different color. It was black, had little feathers that wafted

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in the wind. And then all of these big feathers, I couldn't really see it clearly. Couldn't

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see the whole figure or the whole of the, the costume for one of a better word, but

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it wasn't because it was, it was him. It's just the only way that I can describe it.

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And he was kind of lying there with this, this countenance of like just a sort of semi

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smile. So he was lying. He wasn't upright next to you.

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Oh, he was lying horizontal, just lying there, floating.

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This is interesting. So unusual for a near death experience. Keep going.

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Tell me about it. I've Googled it. I've done everything possible. I can't figure it out.

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So there he is, horizontally lying there, just kind of like with this expression of

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fineness beneath this, this beak. And so I could only really see kind of his, his jaw

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line and the, and the lips. So what happened then is, is all stuff to do with me. So I

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kind of straightened myself up and he was still lying there. And I became aware of my

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granddaughter, Layla, who was yet to be born. So the first time this happened was the 29th

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of June, 2021. And Layla was born on 12th of July. So I became aware of, of, of Emily

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and her. And I just said, no, I want to meet her. I didn't shout. I didn't scream. There

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was no, there was no sense of conflict. There was no sense of panic or worry. But I heard

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myself say it.

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And you did say the word no. Does that mean, does that mean you were not going to come

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back, but through this communication, whatever we want to call it, maybe you were allowed

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to?

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I genuinely don't know. I mean, I literally, I'm just saying verbatim what, what happened.

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My interpretation of it, I don't know because I genuinely would be kind of, I guess, making

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assertions that it meant this or it meant that or it meant the other. I don't know what it

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meant. I equally don't know why in that, in that situation I started to then do the simplest

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of Tai Chi, Chi Gong moves with him lying there. And now I'm kind of upright, floating,

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doing this and I can see him sort of, I see my hands in front of me and then I can see

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him in the background. I do this maybe four or five times, this simple Tai Chi move and

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then boom, I'm back and Mr. Pujaro, who was one of the three brain surgeons I had. So

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we, we nearly lost you. I guess what, I guess what I would say, I suppose one of the reasons

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that I don't have a kind of interpretation of it is because it's so different to anything

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that I'd kind of heard of before or thought of before that I'm just, I just kind of, I

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let it, I let it sit where it is really. If someone had, you know, at that point, I guess

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I would have been totally cool and fine and would have forgotten about it. I'd have put

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it down to the medication, I'd have put it down to, you know, the surgery, I'd have put

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it down to all of the, all of the stuff that was, that was going on except that what happened

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with me is I had a, I had a raft of complications and I had a seizure and then on the 10th of

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July, I experienced it again, identical down to the last millisecond, the exact same thing.

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So it's because of that that I'm like, whoa, this, this is like, this is different. This

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is, this is something that I can't put down to the chemicals or the, you know, this is,

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this was like a massive, massive mammoth thing.

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Yeah. These weren't dreams. These were real experiences. And Jason, it's only been two

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years.

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It's not even that. It was July. Yeah.

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I mean, 21. Yeah.

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It's been just under two years and you've had a lot of healing to do over that time.

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Yeah.

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With your, your brain and everything. You might find over the next few years that it comes

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a little bit more clearly into view. In other words, you may be able to interpret it a little

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bit or maybe not. You know, I don't know. And this show isn't about, you know, interpreting

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these things for you, but just to find out what happened to you. But I have a feeling

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you're going to understand it better as time goes on. Have you had a chance to talk to

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other people that have had near death experiences?

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Not really. No. The thing that I found is that people, people are quite reticent about

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mortality. So no, it's not been something that I've kind of broached with people.

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Yeah. Well, and times are changing. And I don't know how it is in England. I know how

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it is here in the States. And that is that, you know, if you had an experience like this

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30, 40, 50 years ago, people just thought you were crazy. But it's being much, much more

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accepted now, not only by the general population, but also by the medical field.

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Yeah.

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They're realizing there is something happening because we're hearing this often. And these

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people are not crazy. These people are completely lucid. They know what's going on.

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Exactly. And I guess it's kind of like when people have asked me to explain it to them.

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So imagine that, imagine there is a metro, right? And there's all these different stations,

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say in New York or in London, right? And I don't know whether you've been to Piccadilly

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Circus, let's say, or you've been to...

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Yes, I have.

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You have.

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And I'm familiar with your underground.

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All right. So supposing you've been to Piccadilly Circus. So you can picture Piccadilly Circus.

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You can visualize Piccadilly Circus. So all of the things that you're thinking at the

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moment, all of the thoughts that you're having, everything is framed within your physical

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experience of having been to Piccadilly Circus. Now, my physical experience of this near-death

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experience is the equivalent of you've never, let's say you've never been to Manchin House,

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right? But you imagine now in your mind the Tube Station Manchin House and you're basing

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it on Piccadilly Circus. But what if Manchin House was completely different outside of

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what you have experienced? If it was an entirely different concept, you would still infer Piccadilly

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Circus upon Manchin House, even if it's totally, totally, totally, completely and utterly outside

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of that realm. And I guess one of the reasons I haven't really talked about it is because

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it's very, very difficult to find words to express if going to Manchin House meant going

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to a different realm of space and time and trusting me and believing me that that's what

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would happen to you if you got out of Manchin House. It's a really difficult subject to

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be able to speak about when you've actually experienced it because you would not accept

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having been to Piccadilly Circus. You'd be, wait a second, Manchin House is not going

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to differ that much from Piccadilly Circus. This guy is a lunatic. This guy is being ridiculous.

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He's telling me that Manchin House is like, is this entirely different world? And I'm

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saying, yes, Piccadilly Circus is dreams. Manchin House is a near-death experience.

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They're completely miles apart in terms of what they are from my human experience. And

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maybe that's why I've been reticent about talking about it until speaking to you, which

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is a relief. It's so nice to be asked to talk about something that is so profound and so

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life-changing to actually be encouraged and wanted to speak about it is in many ways a

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relief.

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Well, I'm glad. I want you to know that I believe you what you're telling me. And our

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audience in our show is completely non-judgmental. We're not in this to say, oh, you're making

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this up or something. I do a little bit of that before I put people on the show and they

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don't get on if it doesn't seem real to me. But maybe that's not fair. But anyway, that's

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besides the point. It's interesting what you were just saying. I think one of the things

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that I have found in interviewing so many people that have had these experiences and

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the fact that they are all different, one of the questions that constantly comes to

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my mind, are they different because people are different? Are they different because

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their spiritual experience just was different? Do we interpret it different? Are we presented

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with something different? One of the conclusions I've come to is that people are put in a situation

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that they're comfortable with. For example, some people that you would say are very religious

249
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and pray a lot and all those kinds of things have experiences where they feel like they

250
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were very close to God, not all of them, some of them. Some feel like they've even seen

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and talked to Him. Others, it's more of a blur. It's more of a just a wonderful, loving

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feeling and I saw lights and things like that. I don't know if it's because some people

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are prepared for this and some people prepared for the other. And I have no idea at all why

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you saw someone in a black crow kind of costume. That's very unusual and that doesn't mean

255
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it's not real. And I don't know what it means. I think you'll figure that out someday because

256
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why would you have been given this gift of this experience if it was never going to mean

257
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anything to you? What's the point of that?

258
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I certainly think that that figure has kind of had meaning to me since. At first, he was

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a figure of terror. When I came home from the hospital and the security of the hospital,

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just my wife and I trying to deal with this guy who's just barely able to kind of move.

261
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I couldn't see, I couldn't hear very well. I had this kind of terror that what I'd experienced

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was that when I said no, that I should have said yes, that he was there to kind of get

263
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me. And so I had this whole thing where I thought to myself, he's going to come and

264
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he's going to come and get me and everything is going to go wrong. So I got paranoid about

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every single thing. Then I had this, I had this idea that, well, I'm going to have to

266
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get used to this somehow. And I'm going to have to deal with this somehow. So I did this,

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I did this, you do a lot of meditation in Tai Chi. And I thought, okay, I'm going to

268
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meditate myself with him all night long. So I'm going to see myself do the whole of Tai

269
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Chi to go all the way through with him. If he comes and he gets me and I don't survive,

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then I don't survive. But if I do survive, then it's okay. He's not there to kind of

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take me away. Now, the first thing is I had no idea whether that would, whether I'd be

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able to do that, to kind of see myself with him. And I was pretty scared of doing it.

273
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I was terrified of doing it. But I did. And I guess I was able to really kind of find a

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way for us to sort of be friends in a weird kind of way.

275
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Sort of like facing fear in other times in life.

276
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Yeah, I guess.

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You know, sometimes when we face it head on and go, okay, I'm afraid of this and I'm going

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to do this anyway, then we gain all kinds of power from it.

279
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Did you have an, would you say an unusual, unusually high fear of death before this experience

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happened?

281
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No.

282
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Do you have less or more fear of death now?

283
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I have zero fear of death now.

284
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If I had a shilling for every time that someone has told me that on this show.

285
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Really?

286
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Yeah, I hear that every day.

287
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Really?

288
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Yeah. Yeah, the fear of death usually nearly always completely goes away after an experience

289
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like this.

290
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Totally gone.

291
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Yeah.

292
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Completely gone.

293
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And that doesn't mean you want to die today. No, there's great things to live for. But when

294
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it's my time, that's okay. I don't need to be afraid of it.

295
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:09,480
Yeah.

296
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I did want to point out one thing. It seems like you came back for your granddaughter.

297
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You really wanted to meet your soon to be born granddaughter, right?

298
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Yes. And yes, I think so. But it wasn't like a massive, emotive thing. That's the bizarre

299
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thing about it. It didn't contain, because people have said to me, oh, you fought for

300
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your life. Like, who was I going to fight against? I did Tai Chi.

301
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Yeah, fight is definitely the wrong word.

302
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You know what I mean?

303
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Yeah.

304
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And in terms of like all of the emotions that I was feeling, of course I wanted to meet

305
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Layla. But I equally wanted to be there with everyone all kind of at the same time. I think

306
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it's just, I just said it.

307
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Yeah. Some people that have near death experiences are given a chance, their opportunity. Do you

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want to stay there? Do you want to go back to your body? Some people are not given a

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chance to make that decision. Of those that are given the opportunity to decide, quite

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often the decision is based on, I just really feel like either I need to get back to someone

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or I want so badly to get back to someone. And I just kind of feel like yours falls a

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little bit into that category where, yeah, it wasn't a fight. This was a conscious, almost

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discussion where it was like, I want to go meet Layla. So let's do that.

314
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Possibly. But it wasn't that conscious. It wasn't that narrative. I just happened to

315
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say it. But it was probably the most profoundly peaceful experiences I've ever had.

316
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Can you describe that more? Profoundly peaceful. What else did you feel?

317
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I felt like there was no kind of time. The thing I felt more than anything was this,

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was the falling in the pit of my stomach. I had this physical, visceral feeling still

319
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with me while all of this other stuff was going on, which I guess is the thing that

320
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made it so absolutely kind of like real both times was that, you know, was preceded with

321
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this falling backwards thing four times. And they were like proper, you know, the proper

322
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falling treatment. It wasn't just like, oh, I'm closing back. It was like proper bang,

323
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bang, bang, bang. Got your attention. That's for sure.

324
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Yeah. And but I have no idea of the time it took. I've no idea of any of those kind of

325
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qualities other than those were the events that I can pinpoint within the context of

326
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that whole kind of experience.

327
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:41,960
So let's talk a little bit about what's happened since then. How has it changed your life?

328
00:33:41,960 --> 00:33:46,880
I mean, physical trauma, but what else has happened?

329
00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:55,400
I have a lot of difficulty with fitting back into society with my brain injury. You know,

330
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people with brain injuries don't do well with background noise, fluorescent lighting. It's

331
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over stimulation.

332
00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:13,360
Yeah, everything is just all comes at once. Brain fatigue. I think it's I think it's made

333
00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:21,160
me kind of quite feel I've described it as feeling like an alien being or in a foreign

334
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land. It's very difficult to have those points of connection with with people. Those points

335
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of understanding. I don't know whether it's because I don't have that sort of sense of

336
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community anymore. I think that I've become really connected with with that realm and

337
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with that place. And in a way, it's like sometimes the world of potential death or the world

338
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of otherness is so much easier than our world. I think I've gained a lot of foresight into

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00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:19,680
like the human condition. I think that's what this experience has given me. See, I used

340
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:31,040
to I used to think I think like most of us think in very binary terms, good, bad, right,

341
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:39,600
wrong, black, white, life, death. But I think this has taught me that my experience of like

342
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near death experience and people facing extreme things is that none of that is actually true.

343
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What is really true is that we're we are, I believe we live on an astral plane, a spiritual

344
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plane, and that everything that is contained within that astral plane, we have an indomitable

345
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spirit to adapt and overcome. And that we therefore can create, we can build, we can

346
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have the incredible medical science that saved my life and all of those aspects of life that

347
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is so extraordinary and so unique to the to the to the human experience. It's also the

348
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indomitable spirit is also the thing that makes war possible. The indomitable spirit

349
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is the very thing that, you know, the greatest thing for us is the biggest thing against

350
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us in many ways, I think. It made me aware of of people under those circumstances. Because

351
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I think what tends to happen is people think, you know, this sort of stuff is what happens

352
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to other people. And it's not. It's a cosmic blink away for every single one of us. It's

353
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a cosmic blink. Not if but when this stuff happens. You realize that I don't have to

354
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summon up the courage to overcome my fear that there is no fear instinct. There is no

355
00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:41,360
flight instinct within human beings. We have an indomitable spirit. Our instinct is to

356
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adapt and overcome. That's what we do. And that I think is what I've become like super

357
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:58,880
aware of since this experience is the and I feel sometimes like I just want to I just

358
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:10,320
want to get the world to listen to just say, look, if you could just understand that all

359
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:20,960
of this binary stuff is just stuff that you're being fed. Wars cannot be fought by people

360
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:31,440
that are overcoming an instinct. It's an impossibility. They can only be fought by people who actually

361
00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:39,920
don't have that instinct, but you're made to believe all the time in the binary world,

362
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:45,200
not in the world that is the astral plane. I'll give you an example. So let's take your

363
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:50,480
microphone, for example, that's in front of you. So that microphone is in existence. There

364
00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:56,760
it is. We you and I can both see that might we can touch it. We can feel it. Now for some

365
00:38:56,760 --> 00:39:06,000
of that Mike's life, it existed on the astral plane. It existed in the mind of its creator.

366
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It existed in the mind of the manufacturers. It existed as a design. It was then put together

367
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and it became manifest. And that's what we do stuff that's in the astral plane. We create

368
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we create whatever is kind of going on in that astral plane. And I think that the whole

369
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coming back from that world, coming back from that place, coming back from wherever it was.

370
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That made me realize that there wasn't anything special about me. You know, it wasn't that

371
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I'm brave, although the people of Ukraine are brave or the people in hospital there

372
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isn't bravery about it at all. It's just part of who we are to adapt to overcome to make

373
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to create to believe in something. You have to believe in the microphone in order for it

374
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to become a microphone. You've got to believe in it. If you have a thesis, you've got to

375
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believe in the potential outcome of that that that thesis. When I think about the black

376
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and white way of thinking that is required in order to get a kind of tribalistic reaction

377
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:59,000
in people to control people, I just get a profound sense that it's so far removed from

378
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who we actually are and what we actually do.

379
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:09,840
And I just add something to that. And that is that who we actually are is so much more

380
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:15,200
than just what I'm seeing of you and you're seeing of me right here. Right?

381
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:16,200
Yeah.

382
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:22,720
There's more before, there's more after, there's more that we don't understand. There's

383
00:41:22,720 --> 00:41:28,360
all kinds of more going on here. Okay, let me ask you a few other questions.

384
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:29,360
Yeah.

385
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:37,680
Based on the last just under two years now, how, you know, I feel like this has changed

386
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:45,240
you. Do you have interest in picking up your acting career again if you felt physically

387
00:41:45,240 --> 00:41:50,440
and mentally able to do it? Or do you want to stick with writing and other things?

388
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:56,200
That's a really, really difficult question. The problem with picking up an acting career

389
00:41:56,200 --> 00:42:05,080
is that it's like, yeah, if someone were to just hand it to me, then yeah, no problem.

390
00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:14,760
But, you know, acting careers take a lot of fighting for and certainly in the moment,

391
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:16,200
I'm not recovered enough to

392
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:18,200
Take on that fight.

393
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,520
Yeah, or confident enough.

394
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:21,520
Right.

395
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:28,520
I mean, I would do to do that. Whereas with the writing, I mean, it's partly a good way

396
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:32,000
of dealing with insomnia, you know, but

397
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:36,760
Well, you can also do writing more on your own and at your own speed and pace.

398
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:48,920
Yeah, exactly. I mean, for me, that would be the coolest thing. You know, if this book

399
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:55,480
were to do well, you know, and I could then, because I've written a second book called

400
00:42:55,480 --> 00:43:02,760
The Art of Letting Go. And if that could be made to work, then that would be an amazing

401
00:43:02,760 --> 00:43:09,240
creative outlet. I don't think I would need the acting side of things.

402
00:43:09,240 --> 00:43:17,360
Okay. How has what happened to you changed your relationships or has it with people that

403
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:20,480
you love, your family, for example?

404
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:27,960
I think it's been incredibly hard on my family, especially on Fay and my wife. You know, she's

405
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:33,840
always she's always worried about me. She's always got something to worry about. I mean,

406
00:43:33,840 --> 00:43:44,760
I'm not in any way kind of out of the woods as far as brain injury is concerned. And,

407
00:43:44,760 --> 00:43:56,760
you know, the ill effects of that. I mean, I'm sure you can hear I struggle formulating

408
00:43:56,760 --> 00:44:04,200
words sometimes I struggle, you know, with what it is I'm trying to express. Just going

409
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:09,000
to the supermarket is like a nightmare sometimes.

410
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:11,560
Making decisions. Are they difficult?

411
00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:17,480
It's just the physical thing. I literally I will just start crying and blubbering in

412
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:21,720
the middle of a supermarket and because it I'm overwhelmed.

413
00:44:21,720 --> 00:44:25,280
Yeah. Have you been able to get back on your bike?

414
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:32,160
No, I got rid of it. I got rid of it completely. I've been like a Shaolin monk in terms of

415
00:44:32,160 --> 00:44:35,160
Tai Chi.

416
00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:41,360
Tell us about that. I see that you're teaching some how are you spreading goodness with Tai

417
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:42,360
Chi?

418
00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:56,080
Yeah, I'm I'm I'm teaching Tai Chi twice a week. And I'm teaching in a local college

419
00:44:56,080 --> 00:45:05,280
in Henley three days a week. And you know, I'm I'm I'm managing I'm managing it. And

420
00:45:05,280 --> 00:45:12,640
the Tai Chi is is a lovely experience because I have these I have groups of people or I

421
00:45:12,640 --> 00:45:19,920
have individual clients who come to me. And you know, they they really want to they really

422
00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:24,160
want it. They really want to know about it.

423
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:31,240
It's great in a way because I'm just like the Tai Chi messenger. You know, it's just

424
00:45:31,240 --> 00:45:39,080
literally like, come along and and follow me and and and and here we are. And this is

425
00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:47,160
it. The difficulty I have is because my long term memory loss. You know, I don't remember

426
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:55,440
learning like I don't so much in my life. I don't remember. It's like being dropped into

427
00:45:55,440 --> 00:46:06,280
a black ocean. So everything from the hospital until now, I remember with absolute clarity.

428
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:13,600
But from before the hospital, it's not very much. No, I think it's pretty amazing to have

429
00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:19,520
written two books in less than two years since that traumatic of a brain injury.

430
00:46:19,520 --> 00:46:26,840
Oh, thank you. Yeah, it's it was a lot of it was was my friend Brian Blassett, who was

431
00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:35,840
like, you know, you're going to write this book. It's like, okay, Brian, yeah. And and

432
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:43,960
then I think a lot of it was a kind of therapy in a way to do with also being so heavily

433
00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:52,000
involved with with with Tai Chi with with the doing of Tai Chi. You know, it's some

434
00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:58,600
the doing of Tai Chi and the teaching of Tai Chi. It's become something that is like supremely

435
00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:07,520
important and part of like a daily ritual almost this like this is this is who I am

436
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:13,880
now and if I if I don't do it, I won't be all right. I do it all the time.

437
00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:17,920
Sounds like it's been very healing for you in many different ways.

438
00:47:17,920 --> 00:47:26,480
I think so. You know, they I've been told by numerous kind of medics and so on, but

439
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:32,440
there's not many people that come back from the first thing that happened. And it's almost

440
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:38,920
always the second infection meningitis in my case and seizure and all of that. The virtually

441
00:47:38,920 --> 00:47:46,560
nobody kind of comes back. Nobody survives it. And I guess I feel like it's been possibly

442
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:55,280
something to do with the residual physical strength of Tai Chi, possibly the residual

443
00:47:55,280 --> 00:48:02,080
mental strength, although it doesn't feel like it often, but some but I guess the repetitive

444
00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:11,960
nature has a real healing quality to it. Perhaps it helps with the reformation of neural pathways

445
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:20,480
that have been damaged because I had a lot to repair. I was blind in one I couldn't really

446
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:28,680
see couldn't hear had some paralysis I had, you know, various things I had to kind of

447
00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:35,480
overcome. I think that I think there's a there's a fair group of people that feel that that

448
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:44,880
Tai Chi has had a very positive and influential effect upon that kind of healing. And I guess

449
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:49,800
the thing and I guess the you know, the thing about the book is that, you know, there was

450
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:55,360
a big part of me that wasn't going to include it at all. That I was just going to I was going

451
00:48:55,360 --> 00:48:59,520
to talk about, I don't know, I mean, I wasn't going to write a book, I wasn't going to talk

452
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:08,480
about this. But it's been so there's been so many people. And Brian blessed was the

453
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:14,440
was the kind of biggest voice for this who said, But Jason, this is this is so helpful

454
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:21,040
to so many people. It's not just about coming back from where you've come back from. It's

455
00:49:21,040 --> 00:49:30,560
such a helpful thing for people. And it's such a positive thing. And it's such a spiritual

456
00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:36,720
thing. I guess I was persuaded to to share in that sense.

457
00:49:36,720 --> 00:49:42,720
So if you could summarize the message of hope in that book into a very brief statement,

458
00:49:42,720 --> 00:49:49,080
what would you say? I want our listeners to get something from all of this today. And

459
00:49:49,080 --> 00:49:53,000
I know you have a message to share. What is it?

460
00:49:53,000 --> 00:50:02,320
I guess I would say that the message of the of the book is that there are principles contained

461
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:11,240
within Tai Chi that I think connect with near death experience and connect with who we really

462
00:50:11,240 --> 00:50:19,280
are deep down inside the kind of energy that drives us, the kind of people that we truly

463
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:26,400
are. My hope is that that that the book kind of unlocks that to an extent, the people will

464
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:32,800
kind of get those connections. And we'll sort of see from the book that it's it's a kind

465
00:50:32,800 --> 00:50:40,240
of there is in in in practice is practical. I guess the other thing I would say is that

466
00:50:40,240 --> 00:50:47,680
no belief is required in terms of what is Tai Chi. All you have to do is kind of just

467
00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:59,480
do it. It's a physical, visceral experience that enables people to have a kind of meditative,

468
00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:08,960
physical experience. I think there's a I think there's a big hour within that. And the potential

469
00:51:08,960 --> 00:51:21,120
is for kind of everyone to experience to experience that to taste that that sort of hour is hard

470
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:28,920
to explain because it's connected to the near death experiences I had is connected to the

471
00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:36,080
crow man and all of that. All right, last question. Yeah, tell me about Leila. Is this

472
00:51:36,080 --> 00:51:41,600
your first grandchild? Yeah. All right. When we're done, we're going to compare grandkids

473
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:49,080
photos. Okay, we'll do that off air. How's Leila? Leila's great. Leila's doing brilliant.

474
00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:56,160
Emily sent me a little video of Leila just chatting away. And yeah, she's fantastic.

475
00:51:56,160 --> 00:52:01,040
All right. Thanks a lot for being on the show today, Jason. I appreciate it. Thank you.

476
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:08,840
And I apologize that I'm not perhaps as fast as I once would have been. You know, it seems

477
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:17,000
like we often speak before we think in this life. We have so much that we need to get

478
00:52:17,000 --> 00:52:23,600
in or somebody's going to cut us off or something that I find it refreshing to watch your brain

479
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:31,680
go and think before you say something. I liked it. Oh, thank you. Thanks. That means a lot.

480
00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:40,120
Thank you. Thanks again for listening and remember to share this podcast to be notified

481
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:46,400
when the next episode goes live. Follow us on your podcasting app or click over to roundtripdeath.com

482
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:51,960
and sign up for our email newsletter. One last thing, we are continually trying to improve

483
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:57,280
this podcast and we value your feedback. If you have a comment about what you like or

484
00:52:57,280 --> 00:53:02,880
what we can do better or a near death experiencer that we should have on the show, send an email

485
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:09,080
to Eric at roundtripdeath.com and that's Eric with a C. Until then, I wish you everything

486
00:53:09,080 --> 00:53:22,800
good that you're looking for in this life and the next.