Transcript
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From the time that they pronounced me deaf was a good 45 minutes.
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They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped.
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And I could see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realize that was actually my
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physical body because I was somewhere else.
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The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't
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anything else to be felt.
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I was greeted by people I'd known in the past.
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I'm back home again.
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Incredibly safe and felt at home.
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Welcome, welcome everybody and welcome to our special guest, Sean Cubs.
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Jay Cubs, we're just gonna call you Cubs.
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Tell me where that nickname comes from.
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So my mom used to call me her boy cub or cub, it's from the Jungle Book.
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And then, yeah, when I was starting this music project before I had this big hit song that
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moved me down to LA, I was trying to think of a name.
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I wanted it to be as close to me as possible.
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And then that just came up.
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I have a boyishness about me, so I wanted to keep that alive as long as possible.
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I decided to spell it with a V and a Z instead of a U and an S because that was kind of popular
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at the time to do.
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And I didn't want to get mixed up with the Chicago Cubs, but I really shot myself in
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the foot with that.
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It's too late, the more you're made, I'm here.
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You don't look like the Chicago Cubs here, okay.
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Before we talk about your Andy E, take just a second, tell us about your music.
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So yeah, I make pop electronic kind of dance-leaning music.
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It is described by others as soulful and yearning, which is perfectly described what my life
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has been, particularly in the search for fulfillment and the connection to the divine.
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And it has come in a lot of different ways.
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So, since this experience, most of my integration of the Andy phenomena that I experienced was
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their music.
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You know, my first song back from this was called Life Again, and all of the music has
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kind of just been about awakening and rebirth, just packaged in contemporary electronic pop.
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So if anybody wants to hear your music, where do they find it?
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Yeah, just CVBZ on any and all platforms.
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My Instagram and TikTok and all that is just CVBZ.
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And then it'll be the first one, hopefully, that comes up because they didn't go with
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CUBS with the Congress.
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That's gonna be the first.
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All right, the music sounds cool.
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I've actually heard a little bit of it.
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And you might think I'm an old Foggy, but I liked it.
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I really did not.
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And you're a whippersnapper if I've ever seen one, man.
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Whippersnapper with grandkids here.
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That's right.
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As long as you're whipping and snapping and never dies.
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All right.
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So we often, when we're talking about people's NDEs, if it's a car accident, we'll talk about
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all the details of what happened and stuff.
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There are reasons why we can't do that tonight.
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So I'm just letting the audience know.
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We're telling y'all we can, but let's go ahead and jump to that day where your experience
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started.
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This was just not even three years ago.
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Yeah.
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So it was November 17th.
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Yeah.
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Of 2021.
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And I'll just take you to the moment.
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I was lying on the floor of a, of a floor.
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And I was experiencing breath and heart issues.
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You know, there was just this moment that went from like, what's going on to like, oh,
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what's going on to, oh no, this is what's happening.
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And then the, the experience ensued with or without me.
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This is, this is Cubs inside the body, feeling all the regular things, you know, that we
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feel from that perspective.
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Was there a, was there a moment later when that changed?
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Yes.
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Yeah.
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Absolutely.
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Um, there was a moment where there was no body and then eventually there was no memory
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or conception of what a body was or could be.
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So explain for it.
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What does that mean?
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So I believe that where I went was what I've later been told is described or named the
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the Brahma, the Brahman.
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I experienced the plane of non duality of singularity, consciousness of the united God
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head of all in this place of timelessness of no words, no sensations other than love.
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There was no memory of me anymore.
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Um, but this was, you know, into the experience so I can walk us back and get there.
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Yeah.
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Well, start from the beginning, go, go from first to last.
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So there I was having this experience and the panic began to set in of, you know, just
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my heart racing, my breathing, not the mechanism of my lungs that are responding like how they
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were supposed to.
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And then there was this moment of like, Oh my gosh, this is happening.
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My vision started to cave in from like a faded black vignette, you know, into a small tunnel,
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basically.
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And then of course, from that tunnel came a source of light.
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And I wouldn't say that I got closer to the light.
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The light just got closer to me like it was happening, whether or not, you know, I've
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heard some of these stories of people choosing or not, but yeah, it was imminent.
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Yeah.
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Soon people feel like they're traveling towards a light or actually see it.
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So that's kind of interesting.
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It was the reverse of that.
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Well, I certainly was not going willingly.
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So I was in panic.
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I was in absolute resistance.
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So it was like, this is happening, buddy, we'll come to you.
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God will come to you.
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There were a multitude of sensations and perspectives that were occurring through this.
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And the hardest part about trying to describe this besides the inherent ineffable nature
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of what I'm embarking to describe, there was just multiple things happening at once.
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So my mind was racing at a million RPMs.
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I was having thoughts and memories swirling around me like a tornado pretty much.
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And this brought on what I guess the Bible would call judgment or a life review.
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So I essentially relived all of my memories and like the most rapid fashion you could
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conceptualize.
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And I got to not only experience my life, but I also experienced these memories from
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the other perspective.
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So it wasn't visual.
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It wasn't like in my mom's body watching me say like, screw you, mom, you know, like,
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I just could feel the screw you, mom, from my mom's heart.
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There was nothing left unsaid and undone to me about my life.
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After that, I experienced the impact that I had on people for better or for worse and
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not only people, but like the vibrational matrix of the earth plane, not only the earth
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plane, but the spiritual plane, like what my thoughts and feelings, what kind of, I don't
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want to say karma because that's judgy, but yeah, what kind of frequency I carried and
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how that affected the work, the fabric of reality.
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Okay, let's stick with this life review topic for a second.
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Yeah.
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Before we move on.
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I want to dig deeper because this is interesting.
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It almost sounds like you realized that everything you did affected something or someone else.
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Right?
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Yeah.
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In addition to people, you mean?
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Yeah.
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Plants, birds, give me an example.
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Like peat on rocks.
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Like rocks don't really care.
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You know, they're rocks, but it's not great.
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Like I went and upset rocks, but like it just wasn't, I could have peed elsewhere, you know?
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And again, looking back at this from the perspective of the place that I went and the healing that
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took place for me, it was all perfect.
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It didn't really matter because I was supposed to say screw you, mom, and pee on that rock
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and be unkind to this girlfriend or lash out at this person.
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It was all supposed to happen.
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It was all perfect.
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So I don't know if you noticed, you've named all negative things.
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I'll bet you did positive things too.
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Did you get an idea of what the positive things did and what the reaction was?
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Yeah.
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I mean, so the main takeaway from my life, and I think this is just important to say,
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I experienced this life review, all of these sensations as negative at first because I
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was in resistance.
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I was clinging to life.
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It was no, no, no, no, no, no, this is bad.
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Everything's bad.
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It's all not only that, but I kind of started like down this paranoia spiral of like every
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moment and every person I've met that has introduced me to the person that introduced
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me to this person that got me to this place to have this accident.
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And it has all been like this ruse to kill me in this moment.
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There was this moment right after that where it was just despair and hopelessness and it
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was an echo of a feeling that I do carry through life when things go wrong.
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I'm like, oh, where's the justice?
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Where's God?
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Whatever.
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And there was a moment where it all flipped and it was like every single person that introduced
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you to every person that got you to hear to this room, to this accidental moment where
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you, they were conspiring.
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They were conspiring to free you.
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And then when I had that notion, there was this one last flinch of clinging where I knew
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that my earth shan hands were just reaching, reaching, reaching, like somebody please,
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please.
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And then the voice came through and the voice was very calm, dull, yet commanding.
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And it said surrender to the experience.
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Sort of.
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That's at least how I interpreted the download of this message.
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And once I did that, I remember this feeling of release, of release of my hopes and dreams
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and loves, failures, triumphs, the release of all of the beauty and the perfection and
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the love that I've experienced in my life, and it let out of me like a sigh into eternity.
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And that sigh carried me through this river.
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And that's the next part.
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Okay.
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Don't go there yet.
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I have more questions already.
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Come on.
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Do you have any idea?
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I mean, you've had some time to think about this.
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Now, do you have any idea what was the purpose of that life review?
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Was it to thrash you for the things it cubs didn't do right?
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Or was it a learning experience?
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What was the purpose here?
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Yeah.
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It was learning to know thyself, to love thyself deeper.
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So the other thing is to like, you know, neurologically, neurolinguistically, whatever, like the body
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keeps score and the brain, the unconscious mind houses all of what we are, all of our
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experiences, all of our decisions, you know, the conscious mind, they say, I'm not sure
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how they measure this, can compute 126 bits per minute, right?
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The unconscious mind is 2 million, I think.
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Yeah.
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So the mind keeps score.
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Even if you think you're over something or if you've forgotten something, everything
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is housed in the unconscious mind, it is essentially a super computer, a godlike super computer
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with the judgment of a seven year old, essentially, that issues prime directives to your body,
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to your mind.
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It controls your awareness and the way you perceive the world around you.
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So that's a lot.
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A life is a lot of moments.
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And if you're going to let that go, like, you got to take the trash out.
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Because where I was going, I wasn't able to bring anything here with me.
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What emotions were you feeling as you're experiencing these things again?
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So over these past couple of years, I've had to research and find ways to help explain
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this.
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There's the Hawking's scale of consciousness, you know, at the bottom, at the lowest level
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of vibration, there's shame, guilt, and, you know, anger, fear, paranoia, all that stuff.
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Then it goes to acceptance, which is neutral and then courage and all the way up to love,
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joy, everything else.
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So I essentially climbed Jacob's ladder through this experience, through these memories, through
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this clinging, the paranoia, the fear, the shame.
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But that's only the first half of it.
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And then once you get to like, oh, hey, well, I f'd up, I'm dying.
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So then it's like, but then what did we do?
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How did we love?
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When were we brave, you know, and like, that you climb all the ladder all the way to heaven.
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You know, and not coincidentally, the top of that ladder is love and that's all heaven,
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the afterlife, the Brahman, it's all it is, God.
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Absolutely.
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This still cracks me up that you went kicking and screaming.
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It's so typical for people, once they've left their body to be like, oh, okay, done
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with that, moving on, that's cool.
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Yeah.
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And like, I love hearing so many different aspects of these NDEs because they are certainly
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not all the same.
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And I love people to just open up and be honest and hey, mine was different and yours is going
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to be different.
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Let's get back to the voice for a second.
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What is your impression of who or what the voice was?
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So at first it was like, uh-uh, because I mean, it sounded like there's no uncreepy
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way to do this.
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It sounded like surrender to the experience.
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You know, it was like very like.
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Well, that does sound creepy.
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Yeah.
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There's no uncreepy way.
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And so I'm not going to sugarcoat it, but it was humbling, commanding, comforting, and
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the most relaxed voice that I've ever heard.
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Like, you know, so yeah, part of me could have taken it like that's creepy.
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00:16:26,240 --> 00:16:31,360
It sounds like something that's in a weird movie, but it's also like, how many more judgments
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are you going to take with you in this moment?
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Like, are you trying to tack on another judgment?
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You just don't the bunch.
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And when it said surrender to the experience, that could be taken positively or negatively.
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I could be taken like, hey, dude, just give up, or it could be, hey, really go with it.
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This is going to be wonderful.
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Relax and go with it.
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Is that the direction it was going?
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Yeah.
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But again, it's how I took it.
253
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:06,280
So this is like, these are non-verbal, non-phenetic conversations.
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Anything that's happened from this point on in the story, it is a download, which feels
255
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more like an upload from nowhere.
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So that's how I took it in that moment.
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But I think it's important that it came through that way, brother, because I don't surrender
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to anything.
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00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:29,520
My life has just been yearning for one thing or the other, kicking and screaming when it
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doesn't come to fruition.
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00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:38,080
Most of my spiritual journey before this point has basically been a means to an end to have
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or to achieve.
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00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:50,800
So I realized, I had to reconcile that I was given gifts and I was given a really big life
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and a really big life mission.
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Maybe the review wasn't so great because I didn't live so great, perhaps.
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They say you live, or you die how you live.
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Certainly a nice, smiley person, but if I was never satisfied or present, then I'm not
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going to be that when I'm hitching a ride out of town.
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Yeah, we're not going to suddenly just change personalities, are we?
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Yeah, especially in a critical moment like that.
271
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And so upon passing over in the final shettings of the shawness, I for the first time got
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to feel full surrender.
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And it was incredible.
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And I try to close my eyes and I have this anchor that I set in my palm, or I try to
275
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press it and reactivate that feeling because I went from a life of longing to an eternity
276
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of pure satisfaction in those 13 minutes that I was traveling or gone for.
277
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Yeah.
278
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,000
All right.
279
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,000
Tell me what happened next.
280
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:11,280
We got the life review, we got the voice, what happened next?
281
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:20,720
So I was confronted with a void, the void, and I can't tell you if it was light or dark
282
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:27,160
this part because there was no light or dark, really.
283
00:19:27,160 --> 00:19:35,000
I remember the last part of Sean that was there to witness this void was like, oh, this
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is it.
285
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Oh my gosh, like it's nothing, man.
286
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This was like, I was told there was at least something or I was at least told that I wouldn't
287
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:55,240
be here to see the nothing and then it became orange, glowing, orange.
288
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Just everything like the atmosphere, the ground.
289
00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:06,120
Yeah, something between like liquid, liquid plasma, I don't know, it's just, it was spirit
290
00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:07,120
in this realm.
291
00:20:07,120 --> 00:20:15,200
It was just, and again, orange is the way that I'm just like just right into the experience
292
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and orange.
293
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That's how I piece it together as I came back.
294
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But you know, it was more of a sensation, a knowing and all knowing.
295
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,400
It was all colors.
296
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:39,160
It was all things light, dark, right, wrong, a place beyond duality.
297
00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:48,040
And the only actual discernible force was pure love.
298
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And that pure love in itself was awareness and a singular consciousness that had one
299
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mission and that was just to love more, more, bigger, bigger.
300
00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:10,840
And then I almost immediately had an understanding of all things, always, ever how the universe
301
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:16,600
was created, how everything works.
302
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:21,800
Because I was no longer Sean, I was God.
303
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:28,760
I returned to the creator consciousness.
304
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It was absolute perfection.
305
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:35,560
Of all of those things, how much of that do you remember?
306
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:39,160
Do you remember how the universe was created, for example?
307
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:41,880
Yeah, some of it.
308
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,400
I'll try.
309
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:53,760
There was one, the one created two so one could love the other and know the other.
310
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So love could know thyself and love thyself deeper.
311
00:22:00,120 --> 00:22:10,480
From the two, there was polarity and this polarity created forces of disharmony and
312
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duality.
313
00:22:12,360 --> 00:22:25,040
And from that duality, creation itself emerges and that creation is chaos, cataclysm, horror,
314
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darkness, and light, glory, creation, perfection, joy.
315
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:44,160
And then from there, I think we can, that's the three, then the creation story.
316
00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:49,960
And this was all, I mean, so much information so quickly and it was just immediate awareness
317
00:22:49,960 --> 00:23:02,480
of it, immediate ownership of it, appreciation for thyself, ourselves.
318
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:08,960
And I know this is very wordy and I know it may not make a lot of sense to a lot of people
319
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:14,040
listening and I think that there's a reason why a lot of people that you see these videos
320
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:19,920
of are septigenarians and stuff because it's going to take the rest of my life to figure
321
00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:21,680
this out.
322
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:25,960
But this is my mission, it's part of it.
323
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:31,800
So I just want to thank you for having me here now to work this out.
324
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:33,600
And I'm ready.
325
00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:34,600
Okay.
326
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,760
Well, then I have another question for you to think about.
327
00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:38,760
Yeah.
328
00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:41,080
You haven't thought about this yet.
329
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:46,000
Did you feel like you were getting this, I can't remember, did you call it a knowledge
330
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,000
dump?
331
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:50,200
Like all of this was coming to you really quickly.
332
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:55,800
When you really think about it, was it all brand new coming to you or is this all stuff
333
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,880
you already knew and it was like the blinders were being taken off?
334
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:00,880
Yeah.
335
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:05,600
It was a remembering, it was a knowing.
336
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:11,920
And I will say like whatever happened over there and whatever I did learn, there was
337
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:18,840
a sense when I started to regain integrating back into me.
338
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:19,840
I was like, oh, you knew that.
339
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:21,880
You knew that before you're born, you knew the whole time.
340
00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:26,560
Like there was always a part of you that felt that and knew that and everyone else feels
341
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:32,920
and knows that and that's because this singularity is what we are.
342
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:38,680
These people that you're honking at in traffic or these people that you're, you know, fans
343
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:40,720
that you're saying, I love you too.
344
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:44,280
For better or worse, everyone is you, it is God.
345
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:46,480
We are all one.
346
00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:54,400
And in a world where we are programmed and for obedience and just in a dimension of duality
347
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:59,640
where there is light and there is dark, of course, that's our programming.
348
00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:08,720
But that craving for unity for the two to become the one that craving for love, even
349
00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:14,080
the craving that we have in the inclination of polarity to judge to condemn to fight each
350
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:21,760
other, that is all just the creation story happening within us.
351
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:31,720
When I was over there, I did not experience any ascended masters, spirit guides, anything
352
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:32,720
like that.
353
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:40,280
I didn't see my grandma, you know, but I became all of that at once.
354
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:44,240
And when you become all the grandmas in the world and Yeshua and all of the people and
355
00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:54,960
things that have ever happened ever, it is the most tremendous healing, exalting, beautiful
356
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:56,280
experience there could be.
357
00:25:56,280 --> 00:26:03,960
And I wouldn't, I wouldn't choose any in their heaven if I had a choice.
358
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:06,560
I love all the adjectives.
359
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:09,640
Love is one that keeps coming up a lot.
360
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:13,160
And I believe you even said pure love.
361
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:19,440
Please try to dig deeper and describe that for anyone that hasn't felt it.
362
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,720
We've got to relate it to something in life.
363
00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:24,480
So see if you can do that.
364
00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:25,480
Okay.
365
00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:26,480
So pure love.
366
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:28,640
Let me break this down.
367
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:34,680
So I believe pure love would have to be loved of void of duality.
368
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:41,800
So no matter what you do or say for better or worse, good, bad, beautiful, ugly, light,
369
00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:44,800
dark, I love you.
370
00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:47,720
And a lot of people don't experience that.
371
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:55,080
But we do experience being loved like that for even a brief amount of time from our mothers
372
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:59,200
or fathers until conditions are placed on that love.
373
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:04,920
But just imagine the best moment you ever had with your mom.
374
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:12,520
Imagine the way she smelled in that moment, her skin against yours, how you feel in your
375
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:22,120
belly, how you feel in your heart, the way that your breathing might slow down.
376
00:27:22,120 --> 00:27:31,800
The inkling that you have to let out a sigh or a coo or a giggle and take that small moment
377
00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:38,400
and shoot it off into the distance forever and ever and ever and ever.
378
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,960
And that's what it felt like.
379
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:49,400
I've done a lot of experimentation with drugs.
380
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:51,600
Nothing comes close.
381
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:53,360
Yeah.
382
00:27:53,360 --> 00:27:56,800
It was just pure love.
383
00:27:56,800 --> 00:28:07,600
And it was love in a, it was such a pure sensation that nothing could ever have been wrong about
384
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:10,440
my life, anyone else's life.
385
00:28:10,440 --> 00:28:14,880
And I'm saying like, I'm not going to name names, but you guys know the big bad dudes
386
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:16,320
of history.
387
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,320
Like nothing they could have done wrong.
388
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:22,520
Because you love them so much.
389
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,120
And I loved everyone that much.
390
00:28:25,120 --> 00:28:26,320
And I knew everyone.
391
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:32,480
Like everyone, because they were with me, they were me, everyone in existence.
392
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:34,840
It was just perfect.
393
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:41,000
It's hard to comprehend all that, but thank you for trying to describe it.
394
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,680
There's always some people out there that don't believe stuff.
395
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:53,160
Okay, they're going to, they, not me, they may say not to your face behind your back.
396
00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:57,880
Oh, it was drugs or he was unconscious.
397
00:28:57,880 --> 00:28:59,040
So he was dreaming.
398
00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:02,080
He was hallucinating because of something.
399
00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:04,520
How do you know this was different than something like that?
400
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:14,120
Well, I know because I know, but this is something that couldn't be compared to or conceived
401
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:16,680
of in a dream.
402
00:29:16,680 --> 00:29:25,600
Not to my knowledge and to prove whether something is valid or has happened to you really isn't
403
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:30,920
about what other people feel about what you, what other people think about what you say
404
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,360
it's how it makes them feel.
405
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,200
Yeah, absolutely.
406
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:36,200
Okay.
407
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:40,920
Was there anything else to this experience or was that about the end?
408
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:49,720
So during this experience, there was a call to come back and that call was, you know,
409
00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:52,600
I will say it felt like an eternity.
410
00:29:52,600 --> 00:30:03,520
There wasn't time in this situation for me, but the first human sensation or notion that
411
00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:12,520
returned to me was it was like a, a wind, a breeze that came through this space and it
412
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:20,400
was a feminine one and it felt like my partner, Brittany, the women in my life, it was this
413
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:24,040
very feminine call pullback.
414
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:27,680
And then that's when I was like, Oh, I'm remembering my mom, I'm remembering this and
415
00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:30,520
that and that I just came back into my body.
416
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,520
You became Sean again.
417
00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:33,520
Yeah.
418
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:35,520
As you man.
419
00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:37,520
Yeah.
420
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:42,000
This is a really profound experience, especially for somebody as young as you.
421
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:44,560
How has it changed your life?
422
00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:50,360
How is the, is this a Cubs 2.0 now going on?
423
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:57,320
Yeah, it took, I mean, it's taken so long to integrate and, you know, I still just get
424
00:30:57,320 --> 00:31:03,880
so flustered talking about it and it's great, it's cute, but it could take the rest of my
425
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:11,440
life, but, you know, at first I would say it was like six months of really high vibrational
426
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:20,560
living just like, I just felt awashed in God's love and appreciation for life around me.
427
00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:21,760
Like my vision was better.
428
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:26,520
I was just like, you know, it was a restart.
429
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:33,480
And then I've, at some point I kind of started to fall asleep again and kind of go back into,
430
00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:37,160
you know, duality, judgment, scarcity mindset.
431
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:39,520
I don't know why I'm doing that.
432
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:48,120
But it was a downward progression kind of into this place of like, okay, well that happened
433
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:53,080
and the things that happened because of that, now you have a decision to make.
434
00:31:53,080 --> 00:32:01,160
Like are you going to hold on to this experience and hold true to the nature of what you know
435
00:32:01,160 --> 00:32:02,280
you are?
436
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:09,800
Are you going to treat others now knowing that they are you, you are them and what y'all
437
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:12,200
are, are it?
438
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,680
Yeah, it changed my music.
439
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:21,480
The first song back was kind of, you know, the first few albums back were just me reintegrating
440
00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:25,880
this experience, trying to sus it out, describe it.
441
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:32,040
I started making some videos here and there, you know, I lost weight.
442
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:40,000
But the biggest life change came from this very feminine pullback, you know, the thing
443
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:43,120
that anchored me back into this reality.
444
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:47,800
And I think these are part and parcel, these are pretty common with NDAs.
445
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:48,880
Sometimes people make a choice.
446
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:50,520
They're given a, you know.
447
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:52,360
There was just, there was no words in mind.
448
00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:54,520
There was no conceptualization.
449
00:32:54,520 --> 00:33:04,320
So the feminine callback, I found out 24 hours later, my grandma passed away.
450
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:09,080
And we didn't know, my dad just called me and said, hey, she has some pneumonia stuff
451
00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:11,240
where, you know, we're coming here at the house.
452
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:12,240
She's not doing too well.
453
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,560
And I just said, I'm going to buy a ticket right now.
454
00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:16,160
And he was just like, no, don't worry about it.
455
00:33:16,160 --> 00:33:17,160
My mom even called me.
456
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:18,160
She's like, don't buy a ticket.
457
00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:19,160
We're fine.
458
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:20,160
You know?
459
00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:22,960
I'm getting one.
460
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:28,760
And she passed in the middle of the night after the afternoon that I got there.
461
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:36,880
And then about 24 hours later, my partner called me and said, we're having a baby.
462
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:41,640
That was that feminine, you got to go back.
463
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:48,280
It's my belief that this experience and this healing and this wake up call needed to happen
464
00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:54,960
in order for my daughter's soul to choose to come hang, come party with us.
465
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:59,680
I had somebody on the show very recently that was talking about one of the things that she
466
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:07,920
learned in her NDE was about the promises that we made to our children before we came
467
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:13,760
here and how children actually choose their parents before they come here.
468
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:16,160
It kind of ties in with what you're saying here.
469
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:17,160
That's pretty cool.
470
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:18,160
Yeah.
471
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:19,160
I think that's what I got.
472
00:34:19,160 --> 00:34:24,200
And with my grandma, my whole family too, at her funeral, they were just like, I was
473
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:27,600
like, yeah, I found out the day after and they were like, what?
474
00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:30,240
Like, you know, we tracked it back.
475
00:34:30,240 --> 00:34:35,640
She was conceived on 11, 11, just a bunch of cool, fun, cool stuff.
476
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:42,080
But you know, one person getting off the train, the next getting on, you know, it could be
477
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:43,080
her.
478
00:34:43,080 --> 00:34:46,760
It could be my grandma I'm raising.
479
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:50,640
But it was utterly life changing.
480
00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:56,320
And I had to at some point decide, you need to make this change your life.
481
00:34:56,320 --> 00:35:01,840
This isn't something that you just got to walk out of and be like, new lease on life.
482
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:04,080
Because you know, that will fade.
483
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:05,680
And it did.
484
00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:08,960
So yeah, I'm going to go on the internet and talk about this.
485
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:11,700
This is what my songs are going to be about now.
486
00:35:11,700 --> 00:35:19,640
This is what I'm going to bring to the world because if I could remind just one person
487
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:28,440
of what they already know, what they already really, really know for a moment, that is
488
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:30,760
beautiful medicine.
489
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:38,240
The purpose of creation is to love.
490
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:43,280
If God, I've been saying, if God were a noun, it would be loves.
491
00:35:43,280 --> 00:35:47,560
And if God were a verb, that verb would be create.
492
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:51,760
Maybe that's just my frame of reference because I'm a creator.
493
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,160
I make music, but we really all are.
494
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:57,760
And when you do create something, you know, when you have your first child, like that's
495
00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:01,680
a love that, you know, love is creation.
496
00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:02,680
I just got.
497
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,240
Yeah, it's hard to explain.
498
00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:08,400
I'm going to ask you a personal question, you don't have to answer it if you don't want
499
00:36:08,400 --> 00:36:09,680
to.
500
00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:17,320
But a lot of people after their NDE's, the new version of them, the 2.0, their partner,
501
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:24,040
their spouse, their whoever liked the old one better.
502
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:26,000
And things don't work out.
503
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:29,520
I'm hoping you're going to tell me there's a happy ending and you're still together with
504
00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:31,040
this person.
505
00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:33,040
Yeah, absolutely.
506
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:34,040
Yeah.
507
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:38,640
I'm really glad to hear that.
508
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:40,640
Too, man.
509
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,200
All right.
510
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:43,200
We're going to wrap up.
511
00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:46,000
Is there anything else you want to share?
512
00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:54,120
I would just like to express to the good people is saying that you are not separate from the
513
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:57,200
things that you want to be, do and have.
514
00:36:57,200 --> 00:37:01,320
You are not separate from the life that you want to live.
515
00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:04,320
You are not separate from God.
516
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:08,280
You're not less than anything.
517
00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:14,240
And I see you and I love you.
518
00:37:14,240 --> 00:37:19,000
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much fear do you have of death?
519
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:20,120
Zero.
520
00:37:20,120 --> 00:37:25,120
I can't believe you had to think about it that long, but I'm glad you did.
521
00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:35,600
I think near-death experiences, not dissimilar to medicines like ayahuasca and the spirit
522
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:43,720
medicines, they cure two things, the fear of death and atheism.
523
00:37:43,720 --> 00:37:46,120
And this definitely did that for me.
524
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:47,520
All right.
525
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:48,520
Thanks a lot, Cubs.
526
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:49,520
Appreciate you being here.
527
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,920
Thank you for having me, brother.
528
00:37:52,920 --> 00:37:55,720
Thanks again for listening and sharing this podcast.
529
00:37:55,720 --> 00:38:01,840
Don't forget to hit the follow or subscribe button and sign up for our newsletter at roundtripteath.com.
530
00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:06,120
If you want to share your near-death experience or if you have questions or comments about
531
00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:10,440
the show, send an email to eric at roundtripteath.com.
532
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:37,280
Until then, I wish you everything good that you're looking for in this life and the next.
