Dr. Lotte's NDE, "I Was Sucked Out Of My Body!" (Part 1)

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From the time that they pronounced me deaf was a good 45 minutes.

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They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped.

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And I could see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realize that was actually my

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physical body because I was somewhere else.

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The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't

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anything else to be felt.

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I was greeted by people I'd known in the past.

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I'm back home again.

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Incredibly safe and felt at home.

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Welcome to RoundtripDeath everybody and welcome.

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This is going to be really fun today.

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We have Dr. Lottie Valentine with us today.

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How are you?

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I'm great.

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How are you?

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Thank you so much for having me.

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I'm good.

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And it was fun.

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I was asking you about the pronunciation of your name.

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Why don't you tell us where you're from and maybe that will explain a little bit.

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Yeah, so my name is Valentin or Valentine.

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It can actually be pronounced in two different ways.

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And that's because I was born and raised in Sweden, which is in northern Europe, all the

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way up by the North Pole, Scandinavia.

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Everybody gets it confused with Switzerland, but it's Sweden.

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So I think Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Finland up in that area.

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And in Sweden, Valentine's Day is spelled like my name.

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It doesn't have an E on the end.

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And because if you put an E on Valentine, you wouldn't be able to pronounce it in Swedish.

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So the names change with every country, depending on the language that's spoken.

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And so as soon as you leave Sweden, people are going to pronounce your name in English,

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which is Valentine, even though it doesn't have an E on the end.

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As a child, you go to Spain a lot because that's like living in New York, going to

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Florida, trying to escape that winter climate, and then they would always say, you know,

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Valentino, Senorita Valentino.

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So now they add an O. So anyway, so that's why people get confused about, you know, is

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it Valentine?

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Is it Valentin?

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Is it Valentine?

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But it's actually pronounced Valentin or Valentine.

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I'm going to stick with Dr. Lottie.

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How's that?

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Why?

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Make it easy.

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Now, we have a lot of listeners in Sweden.

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So do you want to say hi to them in Swedish?

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Oh, yeah.

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Hey, hey, all the way home in Sweden.

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I grew up in Sweden and moved to America when I was 21.

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So my family is still in Stockholm in the spring in Sweden and many old friends.

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So if you want to say hi to everyone.

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I have one question about Sweden and then we're going to move on, I promise.

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My son spent a couple of years in Norway doing a church mission and he said the Norwegians

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make fun of the Swedes.

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Is it also the other way around in Sweden?

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Do they make fun of the Norwegians?

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Yes, all the time.

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It is just, you know, it's just an old joke, you know, from hundreds of years ago.

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It's just like people have jokes about the Polish people in New York or Italians, right?

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It's the same Sweden and Norway are neighbors.

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And so there's always jokes about how the Swedes are so much better than the Norwegians.

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And then of course it's the same joke in Norwegian about the Swedes.

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But it is, you know, it's not any ill meanings or anything.

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It's just, you know, funny.

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Good fun.

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Like teasing your little brother.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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Well, tell us a little bit about, more about you, including what kind of doctor are you?

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So I'm an NMD and so there's an N in front of the MD part, which means that I'm a naturopathic

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medical doctor.

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And depending on where you live in the United States, the licensing procedure is still ongoing

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in the United States.

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So about half of the states, if you are an NMD, so about 25 states in the United States

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have treats and naturopathic medical doctors as a physician, because we did go to medical

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school and we did pass our boards just like a regular MD.

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But it's the issue that we used to have with the chiropractic physicians before they became

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accepted.

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And now it's that same movement about naturopathic medical doctors.

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And the difference of an MD and a naturopathic medical doctor is that a naturopathic medical

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doctor also studies botanical medicine, acupuncture, homeopathy, nutrition.

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And then of course we all started the pharmaceutical medicines.

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We actually had a few hours more than the regular MDs because we have to be more aware

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of the interaction.

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So it's just a more holistic approach to how we treat the body versus when you go to the

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MD is more of a traditional Western approach.

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You go to a naturopathic doctor, they may say, well, pharmaceutical is your best option

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for this, you know, for this condition.

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But in other conditions, it might be a botanical medicine or homeopathy or acupuncture.

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So your tool bag is just bigger, how to treat somebody.

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So it's a more of a holistic approach to treatment.

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And then you have the functional medicine doctors that are on the wagon, you know, kind

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of saying, I wish I had more knowledge about the integrative medicine.

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So they become functional medicine doctors.

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So they're kind of in between the regular MD and the naturopathic doctor.

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Okay.

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That sounds great.

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And you live in Phoenix?

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Yep.

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I live in Phoenix.

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All right.

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Well, I know you've had a couple of near death experiences.

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I've heard nothing about him yet.

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I'm going to be as surprised as anybody.

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Can you tell us about the first one?

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Sure.

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So my first near death experience was in 1992.

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I was giving birth to my third child that had already given birth to my two boys that

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were now six and three and a half.

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So the birth itself is kind of interesting.

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So we, we had to the hospital because my second boy was born literally in two hours.

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It was such a fast labor.

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So I had a contraction at like two in the morning.

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We had it straight to the hospital.

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We get there.

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I'm in labor and I'm on this table in the birthing room and a 7.4 earthquake.

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So everything, you know, shook a lot and this hospital was built on rollers.

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So it was a fairly new hospital.

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I lived in California at the time and so he was in Eastern Anaheim.

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So for people who are familiar with California, if you've ever been to Disneyland, Disneyland

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is an Anaheim.

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So if you go all the way to the Eastern part of Anaheim, you know, you're bordering more

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on the desert and this earthquake was luckily centered in the desert.

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And that's why we, there wasn't much damage, but this hospital was built literally on the

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edge to the desert.

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So we were really close to the epicenter of the earthquake.

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Everybody started leaning over me on the table, my husband, the nurses, the midwife.

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If they had not leaned over me on the table, they would have fallen down because it shook

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that much and I would have flown off the table.

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So during this earthquake, there's these windows floor to ceiling windows and I'm lying on

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this table and I'm thinking, this is it.

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We're going to all get buried in rubble.

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Those ceiling tiles are going to cave in.

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Those windows are going to shatter.

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You know, all the instruments, you know, in the hospital, they have those metal trays

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with all the instruments.

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They were levitating, jumping up and down on these trays.

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It was like cling, clang.

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We lost all the power, all the lights went out.

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That was one of the times in my life when I thought I was going to die.

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And that experience is very different from my near death experience, which comes in a

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little bit because when you're in a situation like that, and I bet a lot of listeners have

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been almost in a car accident, you're thinking, oh my gosh, this is it.

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This is it.

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I'm going to die.

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And anyway, the earthquake stopped.

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My labor also stopped because it was that a traumatic event.

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So if you're giving birth in the jungle and the lion comes, you're going to stop giving

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birth, get yourself to safety, and then give birth when the lion is not there.

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It's when you're in a situation like that, everything will just stop because your body

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is more interested in saving your life right now.

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My labor stopped.

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And then, you know, after half an hour, an hour, my labor started again.

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I gave birth to my daughter.

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And then they finally, we still only have a nightlight, like the generator in the hospital

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kicked in.

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So we have like a nightlight in this birthing suite.

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And we have another earthquake kick, a 7.2 earthquake.

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This poor man that was drawing my blood, his eyes were like golf balls because he had been

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further away from the first earthquake.

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So to him, this earthquake was worse because he was not much closer to the epicenter.

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And we're all saying, oh, don't worry, this one is a small one and it was a 7.2.

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So it was still a really big earthquake.

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Right.

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And then they finally give me the baby because all this is happening.

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And as soon as they give me the baby, I start screaming and arching backwards saying, take

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the baby, take the baby.

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And I started hemorrhaging.

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So now they come to nurses in the midwives there, squeezing my abdomen and trying to

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make all the blood clots come out, put me on an IV drip.

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It's not like they were going to take me to surgery because we were running on generators,

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right?

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The whole hospital was just trying to make sure everybody on life support is still alive.

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So they put me on IV drop, kept me for another two days, finally sent me home and said, all

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right, seems like the bleeding has stopped and you're good to go.

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Well, 10 days later, I went to my friends were having a baby shower for me because I had

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a daughter and I had two boys before.

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So they were all excited to give me pink dresses and all those things.

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So I get to the park and I feel like I need to use the restroom.

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So I take my kids with me, we go to the restroom and this enormous blood clot comes out, like

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larger than a man's large fists, right?

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Very large.

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And I run back to my friend and I said, something is really wrong.

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And I had had this pain.

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So I would constantly have to sit down to relieve the pain.

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It was like shooting down from my pelvic area down my legs, almost feeling like, imagine

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putting a bowling ball in your stomach and how much pressure that would put.

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So it was that kind of a feeling.

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And I was thinking, what is the difference with this birth?

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Why am I having so much pain?

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So then I had this huge blood clot, put my kids back in the car, drive home, my husband

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comes home from work, takes them to the hospital.

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And my parents are luckily visiting from Sweden at this time.

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So we go to the hospital, they do a manual inspection and they say, oh, everything looks

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good.

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They keep me there for two hours and they say, well, it could have been a second lining

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that came out and they sent me on my way.

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I go home next day, a hemorrhage again.

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And it's in the evening, my husband calls the hospital and I'm yelling to him, I'm not

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going back.

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They're not going to do anything because the bleeding stopped.

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So they said, all right, see the doctor the next day.

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We lived in Huntington Beach, California at the time.

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I see the doctor the next morning, Friday morning, same thing, manual inspection, no

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blood work, no ultrasound, nothing.

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He says, oh, could have been a second lining that came out thinking I had like two linings.

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Like this is so weird.

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And I'm 34 at the time, young, look very healthy.

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You know, it's in June, we're all tanned, living in California.

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I was the picture of health.

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I had just studied nutrition.

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I was eating healthy.

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And he says, all right, well, I'm going to send you home.

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And the next that afternoon, same day, a hemorrhage again.

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So we go back to the ER.

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So now I've hemorrhaged three times, right?

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So they said, all right, well, we're going to do an inspection again, manual inspection,

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no blood work, no ultrasound inspection, leave you on the table.

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So here I'm lying on this table in the ER and I finally start bleeding and I'm thinking,

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oh my gosh, finally, I'm bleeding.

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I'm in the ER.

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They're going to figure out something is wrong.

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So I'm lying.

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I'm not thinking much of it.

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I'm bleeding for three days.

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I think the spirit world sent the nurse to check on me because the timing is literally

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divine.

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So this nurse comes to check on me.

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She opens the door.

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I don't even have a beltering.

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I'm just lying in this ER on this table.

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And she sees all the blood that's on the table and all the paper on the table and her jaw

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just drops.

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I mean, the look on her face is just fear and horror.

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And I hear the call on the loudspeaker OBGYN stat to the ER OBGYN stat to the ER.

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And all I'm thinking is, thank gosh, you know, finally figured out something is wrong.

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Within 30 seconds, this middle-aged doctor runs in full speed.

239
00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:34,720
That's literally out of breath.

240
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:36,960
He probably ran across the hospital.

241
00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:38,920
Younger physician in tow.

242
00:12:38,920 --> 00:12:41,040
Again, a manual inspection.

243
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,640
First he says, how much have you been bleeding?

244
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:46,480
He sees all the bloody papers in the wastebasket because the nurse had tried to clean everything

245
00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:47,480
up.

246
00:12:47,480 --> 00:12:49,320
So I told him, this is, you know, started Wednesday.

247
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:51,480
I've been, this is my third day.

248
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,360
And he said, all right, let's take a look.

249
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:56,560
And they did a manual visual inspection again.

250
00:12:56,560 --> 00:13:00,920
And as they do that inspection, one of those huge blood clots comes out.

251
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:04,240
Oh my gosh.

252
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:05,240
That doctor.

253
00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:06,240
I'm trying.

254
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:07,240
Right.

255
00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:10,440
I'm just thinking, oh my God, thank God I'm in the ER this time.

256
00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,720
I'm even, if I, if I hadn't been, I would have died.

257
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:13,720
Right.

258
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:16,360
So everything is such divine timing.

259
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:20,640
So I'm trying to sit up and tell him, I don't feel too good.

260
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:23,720
Cause now is, you know, I've hemorrhaged this the fifth time I'm hemorrhaging these large

261
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,480
clots in three days.

262
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:28,400
So I try to sit up and he knows now exactly what's going on.

263
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:32,120
Cause he saw the size of that blood clot come out and I told him I've been hemorrhaging

264
00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:33,520
for three days.

265
00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:38,680
So he just pushes me back down on the table and my eyes are now closed because I can't

266
00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:39,920
keep them open.

267
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:43,800
And I hear the room filled with hospital staff.

268
00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:47,840
And I got this nurse on my right that's quoting to put on their blood pressure cuff and she's

269
00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:49,640
quoting my blood pressure.

270
00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:53,680
And I got a nurse on my left that's trying to put an IV in my arm.

271
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:57,360
But you know, my veins are already collapsing because now I'm going into shock.

272
00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:02,880
And so it's really difficult to get an IV in or stick a needle in a vein that's collapsing,

273
00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:06,920
which is why when you go to the ER now, sometimes they just give you an IV and you're thinking,

274
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:07,920
I don't need an IV.

275
00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:09,680
I'm here for something else.

276
00:14:09,680 --> 00:14:13,680
Well, if something goes south and they need to inject you with medication, they now have

277
00:14:13,680 --> 00:14:14,680
an access to that.

278
00:14:14,680 --> 00:14:15,680
They have a port.

279
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:16,680
It's already in your vein.

280
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:18,480
So they don't run into this problem.

281
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:22,920
But in 1992, I don't think that that was probably not a standard procedure.

282
00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:28,520
So here I am lying on this table and I feel like I'm just falling.

283
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:32,320
Imagine jumping out of an airplane and you just without the parachute and you're just

284
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:34,800
free falling down to earth.

285
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:36,080
That was the feeling I had.

286
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:40,160
And it's probably my blood pressure plummeting at that point.

287
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:46,320
And the nurse on my right, who's quoting my blood pressure, said, yells out in this panic

288
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:49,840
voice, 50 over 15, hurry.

289
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:51,000
She yells.

290
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:54,640
So at this point, you know, I barely have pressure to support my heartbeat.

291
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:58,320
That usually goes around, way around like 60 over 20.

292
00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:01,040
And I'm thinking, what's taking her so long?

293
00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:02,040
Why can't she get that IV?

294
00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:04,760
I don't have any medical knowledge.

295
00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:12,680
And shortly after that nurse yells out 50 over 15, hurry, that I know that I am dying.

296
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:17,520
And that experience was very, very different from that earthquake when I thought I was

297
00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:18,520
going to die.

298
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:21,600
Because at this point, I knew.

299
00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:27,560
And I could feel my soul like starting to separate and like coming out of my body.

300
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,800
Like there was a separation happening.

301
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:33,000
And all I'm thinking, I'm a complete atheist at the time.

302
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,720
I don't believe in anything.

303
00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:40,120
Even though I was raised in Sweden and everybody was Lutheran back then because the state and

304
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:42,560
the church had not yet separated.

305
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:45,840
And so you were born in Sweden, you were automatically a Lutheran.

306
00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:48,760
And if you didn't want to be a Lutheran, then you had to tell someone.

307
00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:52,280
And it was this, the church that kept your passport and counted all the people and all

308
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:53,400
that.

309
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,320
So I was confirmed when I was 14.

310
00:15:56,320 --> 00:15:58,520
But I did not believe in anything they taught me.

311
00:15:58,520 --> 00:15:59,520
I didn't believe in God.

312
00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:03,680
I didn't believe in any of the stories or religion or the afterlife or the spirit world

313
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:08,040
or that your spirit survives the death of your body.

314
00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:09,560
I didn't believe in any of it.

315
00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:13,760
And can I just clarify one quick thing before we move on?

316
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:19,200
Based on something that you mentioned a second ago, this is prior to you becoming a doctor.

317
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:22,920
So you don't have all the medical knowledge back then that you do now.

318
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:23,920
Yeah.

319
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:26,840
No, I was only 34 at the time.

320
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,520
And so I had studied nutrition.

321
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:29,920
So I knew nutrition.

322
00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:33,320
So I was really healthy going into this ordeal.

323
00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:37,680
And so my friends were always saying, you're only survived because you were so healthy going

324
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,800
into this ordeal.

325
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,560
And there might be some truth to that.

326
00:16:42,560 --> 00:16:47,240
But here I am on this table and my soul is trying to separate from my body.

327
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,840
And I'm completely aware of the fact that I'm dying.

328
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:52,680
And I'm a complete atheist.

329
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:54,440
So what do I do at this point?

330
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:59,040
I said, well, if there is a God or if there is something out there, this is my only hope.

331
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:01,440
So I pray to God to save my life.

332
00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,880
And I say, I have three children under the age of six.

333
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:06,400
They need a mother.

334
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:07,400
Right.

335
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:11,000
And I was just thinking, my husband can never do this.

336
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,760
He's never going to be able to raise these three kids.

337
00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:14,080
My kids need a mom.

338
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:17,240
They need, I have to be there for them.

339
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:20,320
And shortly after that, I just got sucked out of my body.

340
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:27,960
And that transition of being in your body and being outside your body, it happens so quickly.

341
00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:33,280
I don't, there's no words to describe how quickly that transition happens because, you

342
00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:35,640
know, people ask me, did you leave through your chest?

343
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:37,520
Did you leave through the crown of your head?

344
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:40,000
Or, you know, where was that exit point?

345
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:44,480
No idea because you, um, in my body and then I'm not, it's just, it's the transition is

346
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,480
too quick.

347
00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:46,840
You have no idea what happens.

348
00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:50,760
So then I find myself floating outside my body.

349
00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:56,000
I'm like a couple of feet up in the air and there is this, well, number one, there is

350
00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,720
this note, there is complete peace on the other side and unconditional love and peace.

351
00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:04,560
And you just feel like, wow, like there's no pain or anything.

352
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:05,920
You're just there.

353
00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:11,640
But my first thought was, how can I be outside my body and still be me?

354
00:18:11,640 --> 00:18:13,560
How does this work?

355
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:20,120
Then I also was aware that there was no time on the other side and that I had access to

356
00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:21,400
past, present and future.

357
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,040
There was no, there was no time.

358
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:29,360
The time only exists when I'm in my body in this earthly dimension, but time doesn't

359
00:18:29,360 --> 00:18:31,640
exist on the other side.

360
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:35,000
And I was aware that I belonged to the body.

361
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:39,400
So if you step outside your car or if you step outside your house, you know, that's your

362
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:41,760
car, you know, that's through your house.

363
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:47,880
It was that kind of feeling like I live in that body down there, but the me who I am

364
00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:50,280
is in this spirit form.

365
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:55,000
And then I get sucked back into my body as quickly as I had left my body.

366
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,400
So then they keep me in the hospital.

367
00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:01,320
And then that next day, I'm still trying to comprehend, you know, how could I be outside

368
00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:02,320
my body?

369
00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:03,320
What was that?

370
00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:04,760
Was that the lack of oxygen in my brain?

371
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:07,600
And I'm trying to figure out why that could be.

372
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,120
You know, my dad was a physician.

373
00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:10,120
My mom worked in the hospital.

374
00:19:10,120 --> 00:19:12,400
I was, I was always around medicine.

375
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:14,080
I'm trying to make it logical.

376
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,760
Atheists all do this.

377
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:20,680
They try to justify, rationalize, explain away the whole thing.

378
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:21,680
Right.

379
00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:25,640
You know, you're trying to figure out what that was.

380
00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:31,040
And this nurse that came in the next day to check on me, I think she was Norwegian.

381
00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:32,040
Uh-oh.

382
00:19:32,040 --> 00:19:33,040
That's a problem.

383
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:34,040
Sorry.

384
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,040
Go ahead.

385
00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:37,600
Did anything unusual happen yesterday?

386
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:41,000
Cause she was probably aware of near-death experiences.

387
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:42,920
I had never heard of such a thing.

388
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:44,840
Didn't know anything about it.

389
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:48,880
I figured, well, if I tell her, then they're going to lock me up in the psych ward.

390
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:52,680
So I said, no, no, nothing, nothing happened.

391
00:19:52,680 --> 00:19:59,040
But also that day, I was aware of my sister-in-law in the left corner of my hospital room, ceiling,

392
00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:01,440
and she said, everything is going to be okay.

393
00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:02,440
I'm thinking, okay.

394
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,480
So yesterday, I think I left my body.

395
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:09,480
Today, I think I hear my sister-in-law who passed away 10 days ago and she's in this

396
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:10,480
room.

397
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:12,120
Like what is happening, you know, to me?

398
00:20:12,120 --> 00:20:17,760
And it was a scary thing at the same time because I'm trying to make sense of what is

399
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:22,040
happening because I had no belief in anything spiritual.

400
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:23,880
You've got to let me ask some questions here.

401
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:24,880
Yeah.

402
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:25,880
It's my show.

403
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:26,880
Come on.

404
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:30,680
You really went quickly kind of glossed over the fact that you felt unconditional love

405
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:31,680
and peace.

406
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:36,440
I meant to ask you to explain more and try to dive into that.

407
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:37,920
What did that really feel like?

408
00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:42,760
I can't wait to get to the second end of year because it's so different from my first.

409
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:47,160
So it's almost like, because the first near-death experience was really short.

410
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:51,240
I didn't get to see the light, which I did in my second near-death experience and meeting

411
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:52,960
spirit guides and everything.

412
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:54,440
The first one was so short.

413
00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:59,080
It was like, I always feel like they saved me too quickly and now I have to have a second

414
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:04,160
near-death experience to really get me on track what I'm here to do in this life, right?

415
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,360
Because I didn't have that full effect.

416
00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:08,240
But you did feel something.

417
00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:09,240
Yes.

418
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:14,280
But I still knew because when you're in that state, when you're outside your body, number

419
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:20,120
one, there's no pain in dying because it's just a beautiful experience.

420
00:21:20,120 --> 00:21:22,960
It's nothing to be afraid of.

421
00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:28,000
Death is a beautiful thing where one second you're in your body and the next second you're

422
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,000
not.

423
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:36,480
That feeling of it's just such a tremendous peace and love.

424
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:42,480
You're held for lack of a better word, like in the source or God, whatever you want to

425
00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:46,960
call that, you're just held as an infant and cuddled.

426
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:51,000
You're just this unconditional love feeling.

427
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,800
It's hard to put words to it.

428
00:21:53,800 --> 00:22:00,440
But it's the most tremendous calm and peace and love that you could imagine.

429
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:06,160
So for people who are meditating, ask for divine source or God or whatever you believe

430
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:13,200
in, spirit guides to give you that peace and love when you meditate and you start to feel,

431
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:19,040
get a sense of what that feels like because it's your whole body just feels within this

432
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:20,040
realm, right?

433
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:25,160
It feels around and feels that love, it feels our body when we're meditating.

434
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:28,120
And I'm sure other people can get to this place too.

435
00:22:28,120 --> 00:22:35,920
Yes, you're not stuck with these earthly dimensions of feelings because it's just unconditional

436
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:37,000
love on the other side.

437
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:38,000
It's just peace.

438
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:39,000
Okay.

439
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:42,320
I'll let you go on to experience number two now.

440
00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:46,240
So then I guess there's all these other things that happen in between.

441
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:51,240
My watch is stopped, I had all these electrical interference, took me 12 years to have a watch

442
00:22:51,240 --> 00:22:55,480
tick for 12 years so that we can go into those stories later.

443
00:22:55,480 --> 00:23:00,640
So let me just talk about, you know, and how the spirit world started talking to me during

444
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,960
this period.

445
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:07,400
So my second and this while I was really sick afterwards and I had something called bone

446
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:08,560
marrow suppression.

447
00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:12,520
And so the first thing the doctor said, I have to give you a blood transfusion.

448
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:17,440
You've lost way too much blood and I turned my head slightly to look at the doctor and

449
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,120
he yells, don't, don't move.

450
00:23:19,120 --> 00:23:22,920
Cause he was so afraid I was going to go back in to this, you know, he was going to lose

451
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:26,080
me after he injected me with all, who knows what.

452
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:31,040
I just remember just lots of injections when he saved me and he injected me with all these

453
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:32,040
things.

454
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:33,560
He said, you're not going to feel too good for a while.

455
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,180
And I, he said, I have to give you a blood transfusion.

456
00:23:36,180 --> 00:23:38,680
And I said, do you have to give me a blood transfusion?

457
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:42,840
And he said, do you have religious beliefs that prevent you from getting a blood transfusion?

458
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:49,000
And I said, no, but I have three children under the age of six and this was 1992.

459
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:53,440
And a lot of people back then that got blood transfusions ended up getting AIDS because

460
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:57,200
we did not have any way of checking the blood back then.

461
00:23:57,200 --> 00:24:02,000
And so he said, he understood my concern and he said, well, you are like a young and healthy

462
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:03,000
person.

463
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:04,660
So let's see how quickly you make blood.

464
00:24:04,660 --> 00:24:08,680
So the two days in the hospital, they, you know, they kept monitoring my blood and how

465
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,160
quickly I made blood.

466
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:14,320
They ended up not giving me blood saying, okay, we're going to give you all these different

467
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:15,320
supplements.

468
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,640
You're not going to feel too good for a couple of months because it's going to take you some

469
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:21,040
time to make blood enough to that you don't feel dizzy.

470
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:24,200
So I pretty much slept for two or three months.

471
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:28,120
I have very few memories of July and August.

472
00:24:28,120 --> 00:24:29,480
It was almost September.

473
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:32,280
My parents changed their tickets back to Sweden two or three times.

474
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:36,360
They just kept telling me to stay longer because I couldn't be up yet.

475
00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:39,200
And I just remember my hands and feet being ice cold.

476
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:44,640
I was under, you know, wool blankets in June or July and in California.

477
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:49,360
So I had no blood in my body and my head was pounding and I kept telling me to take it

478
00:24:49,360 --> 00:24:51,920
off the pillow because I would feel faint.

479
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:57,520
And so finally by September, I'm now sitting up and I was sitting in the rocking chair

480
00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:59,960
and then my mother-in-law came to help.

481
00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:04,920
And then at Christmas, we all got the flu and we ended up not having any insurance for

482
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:10,560
that entire year because as all this happens, my husband was a regional manager and his

483
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:12,160
company got sold.

484
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:15,680
And so everybody got laid off from top to bottom, right?

485
00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,800
Of course, in the middle of all this.

486
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:21,960
So he takes the first bed job, best job because he's got support, his wife and his three kids

487
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:23,040
at home.

488
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:26,080
So we were on that three month wait period to get insurance.

489
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,480
We couldn't afford to pay the Cobra payment.

490
00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:32,840
So after three months, he gets another job offer, which is better than the job he's in.

491
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:36,480
So he takes that job and after three months, he gets another job offer.

492
00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:41,120
So we ended up not having insurance until the following year, July 1st.

493
00:25:41,120 --> 00:25:46,000
So that whole year, we didn't have insurance and we all got sick at Christmas and we went

494
00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:47,880
to the walking clinic.

495
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,400
Everybody got antibiotics.

496
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:50,400
Everybody had pneumonia.

497
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:51,400
The boys had pneumonia.

498
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:52,400
My husband had pneumonia.

499
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:53,800
I had pneumonia.

500
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:57,320
And after eight days in antibiotic, everybody was well except for me.

501
00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:58,520
I was even sicker.

502
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,720
So I go back to this walking clinic.

503
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:05,320
They take my blood, they come back in the room and they say, do you have AIDS or leukaemia?

504
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:07,200
Because you have no immune system.

505
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:11,560
And I said, well, I can't have AIDS because they never gave me the blood transfusion because

506
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:13,320
that was the concern.

507
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:16,960
And they said, well, you have to go to the ER because you have no immune system.

508
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:18,720
You have no white blood cells.

509
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:23,480
And I said, I can't do that because we don't have medical insurance and we're going to

510
00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:25,120
get medical insurance soon.

511
00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:27,840
Anyway, they sent me home with all these antibiotics.

512
00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:30,200
They injected me with all this stuff again.

513
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:33,120
They called the next day and said, are you doing better?

514
00:26:33,120 --> 00:26:34,120
And I said, yes.

515
00:26:34,120 --> 00:26:37,640
It took me another couple of weeks, but I finally came out of that.

516
00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:39,560
And then I started bruising.

517
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:44,040
And I had a bruise on my hip that spanned my entire hip area.

518
00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:47,320
So I bumped into the baby's changing table, something that would give you a bruise the

519
00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:49,360
size of a small coin.

520
00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:51,680
I had a bruise that spanned my entire hip.

521
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,800
It was purple and red.

522
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:55,040
And now it's May.

523
00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:56,640
My baby is now 11 months old.

524
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,480
It's almost a year later.

525
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:00,080
I put the kids in the car.

526
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:02,000
I drive myself to the doctor.

527
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:06,080
He sees the big bruise and he thinks that my husband is beating us.

528
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:10,400
So then he rips off the shirts and all my kids, he realizes there's no bruises on them.

529
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:13,520
And I'm telling him, I'm telling you the truth.

530
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:15,280
This is what happened to me.

531
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:17,800
And I bumped into the baby's changing table.

532
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:20,200
So then he believed me and I said, look, that is a doctor.

533
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:23,920
I understand there's something wrong with my blood, but we're getting insurance July

534
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:24,920
1st.

535
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:25,920
And we were in mid-May now.

536
00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:27,680
So it was like six weeks to go.

537
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:29,360
I've survived this whole year.

538
00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:33,920
And I said, as funny as this sounds, I'm better now than I have been the whole year because

539
00:27:33,920 --> 00:27:39,000
I put my children in the car and drove myself here and walked into this clinic.

540
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,840
I'm getting better, but obviously there's something wrong.

541
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:46,880
Anyway, he gave me all the lab work, which I didn't do because I knew that I would have

542
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:50,040
a pre-existing condition and then I wasn't going to get insurance.

543
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:54,240
And I said, well, I've gotten out of all these problems the entire year.

544
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,720
So I just ripped them up and I luckily got better.

545
00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:00,280
During this whole time, I have visitations from the spirit world.

546
00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:02,080
I'm here in the spirit world.

547
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:03,520
But then another year goes by.

548
00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:10,320
So not two years later in 1994, I am living with this bone marrow suppression and always

549
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:15,120
having this feeling of my soul leaving just like it did in the ER the first time where

550
00:28:15,120 --> 00:28:18,760
you just feel like your soul is separating from your body.

551
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,600
So this is just my normal life at this point.

552
00:28:21,600 --> 00:28:25,680
Every time I stand up, every time I bend over, lying in bed at night, I have to take my head

553
00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:30,040
off the pillow because my head is pounding because I don't have enough blood.

554
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:33,960
So my second NDE happens in the middle of the night.

555
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:37,920
I wake up, my head is pounding, I take my head off the pillow and just like the first

556
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,480
time I just get sucked out of my body.

557
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:45,200
But the second experience is so different from the first because now I am tumbling through

558
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:50,480
darkness, I think like a spaceship traveling in Star Wars, right?

559
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,960
So I'm traveling through darkness like tumbling.

560
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:59,880
And I get to this place that I call the mid station because I knew that there were, it

561
00:28:59,880 --> 00:29:03,480
was like an awareness that I could be higher or I could be lower.

562
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:08,480
So imagine going into a skyscraper and there is a hundred floors in the skyscraper and

563
00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:10,960
you push the button on the 50th floor.

564
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:14,720
When you get off on the 50th floor, you know there's floors above you.

565
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,160
You know there's floors below you.

566
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:18,720
You just don't know what's on those floors because you can't see them.

567
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:23,200
But that was the feeling that there was like levels and I call it the bouncing station because

568
00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:24,200
they sent me back.

569
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:26,480
I did not get a choice to stay.

570
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:27,960
Like some people say, oh, I had a choice.

571
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:28,960
I could stay.

572
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:30,080
There was no choice.

573
00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:36,400
So I get to this mid station and the first thing I hear is the most beautiful music.

574
00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:38,720
And I'm thinking, where is this music coming from?

575
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:44,560
And I look to my right and for all the people in Sweden, what I see is a log cabin.

576
00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:48,200
So I'm thinking, well, the music must be coming from this log cabin.

577
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:53,120
So I open the door, I look inside and it looks like it literally looks like a sauna, like

578
00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:56,120
a Swedish sauna, a small log cabin.

579
00:29:56,120 --> 00:29:59,440
And I open the door, I look inside, but it's empty.

580
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:03,760
And I look to my left and I see a mirror image of the log cabin on my left.

581
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:07,400
I open the door, I look inside, but it's empty.

582
00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:09,560
But then I'm thinking, where is this beautiful?

583
00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:11,240
The music is so beautiful.

584
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:14,200
It's more beautiful than any music you can make here on earth.

585
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,120
I tried to make the music.

586
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:18,320
We had a synthesizer with like 200 sounds.

587
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:25,360
There was not one sound on the synthesizer that I could make similar to this beautiful

588
00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:26,440
music.

589
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:30,080
So then as I'm in this state, I become aware of this bright white light.

590
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:34,280
It's almost like I was standing the way I would say it's like you're standing inside

591
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:38,920
a cloud and then somebody's shining one of those really bright spotlights that they have

592
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:43,680
at like a soccer game or, you know, like a sports arena.

593
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:47,040
And so I'm surrounded by this bright white light.

594
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:51,440
I'm standing in it almost like you're standing in a cloud or standing in a fog.

595
00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:55,200
But this bright white light, it extends everywhere.

596
00:30:55,200 --> 00:31:01,800
But this bright white light, there is a knowing that this bright white light is God.

597
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:06,120
It is divine source that we come from this light.

598
00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:10,880
So there was this knowing we come from this light, we are part of this light and we carry

599
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:16,440
this light within us and we come and return to this light when we die.

600
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:23,040
And that light is, that is the unconditional love bliss.

601
00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:25,480
You would never want to leave this light.

602
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:28,400
Like if you could stay there, if I did, I'd say, do you want to stay?

603
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:29,400
I would say yes.

604
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:30,400
Yes, please.

605
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:31,400
Right.

606
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:36,920
Because it's just this enormous love and bliss feeling.

607
00:31:36,920 --> 00:31:43,000
In this light, I see an outline of angels and the music is coming from the angels.

608
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:49,480
But I am completely aware of the fact that I'm seeing angels and thinking, I don't believe

609
00:31:49,480 --> 00:31:50,480
in angels.

610
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:52,080
Like why am I seeing angels?

611
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:56,920
You know, these things aren't supposed to exist because I'm still me in this condition.

612
00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:57,920
Right.

613
00:31:57,920 --> 00:31:58,920
I'm still me.

614
00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:01,080
I'm still the person I am here on earth.

615
00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:02,360
Like I'm still my same spirit.

616
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:06,760
I'm still thinking this can't be angels aren't real.

617
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:12,280
But here I am seeing, hearing the angels creating this beautiful music and then I've become

618
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:17,640
aware of these two spirit guides and they're talking to each other, but I can hear them

619
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:21,280
and the spirit guide on my right says to the one, if they are going to lead in front of

620
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:23,640
me to the left, what is she doing here?

621
00:32:23,640 --> 00:32:24,640
She can't be here.

622
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:28,760
She has to go back and I'm saying, no, no, no, wait a second.

623
00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:29,960
How can this be?

624
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:32,960
How can I be outside my body and still be me?

625
00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:33,960
Right.

626
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:37,720
I've been here for two years now, me trying to come to terms with my first near death

627
00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:38,720
experience.

628
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:42,880
And the spirit guide diagonally to the left in front of me says, well, if I told you,

629
00:32:42,880 --> 00:32:45,040
you won't, you wouldn't remember.

630
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:50,360
So I would say there's some kind of like control mechanism of what we get to remember.

631
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:55,960
But then it's like I'm standing on the moon looking down on the earth and around the earth,

632
00:32:55,960 --> 00:33:02,240
there is this, what I called at the time, because this is 1994, a silvery glittery fishnet

633
00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,840
because we didn't have the internet back then.

634
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:07,680
You couldn't Google, you know, grid around the earth.

635
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:12,960
I spent years coming to San Francisco public library trying to find what was that that

636
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:14,200
I saw.

637
00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:19,520
So I call it the fishnet only because I was raised in Sweden and in the summers I spent

638
00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:23,360
my time on an island without electricity or running water.

639
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:27,760
And I would row the boat for my grandmother who laid fishnets in the ocean to catch fish

640
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:28,760
for the family.

641
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:33,240
And when she lifted those fishnets out in the early morning sun, the water droplets on

642
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:35,800
that fishnet would sparkle in the sunlight.

643
00:33:35,800 --> 00:33:40,280
So that was my description of what I saw was like, it looked like a fishnet that was sort

644
00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:41,680
of sparkling.

645
00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:47,600
And the spirit guide said, everything on earth is connected to each other, but everything

646
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:51,080
on earth is connected up to this grid.

647
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:57,560
And with that message, I got sent back to earth, which has then, you know, taken me 29

648
00:33:57,560 --> 00:34:04,440
30 years to put these experiences understanding what the meaning of all these experiences

649
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:05,440
were.

650
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:11,240
But now in my work today, where I work as an ancestral healer, I work as a medical medium,

651
00:34:11,240 --> 00:34:15,720
I'm an evidential psychic medium, I do spirit readings for people as well.

652
00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:21,320
Now I understand it, but it took a long time to understand what is that interconnectedness.

653
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:26,680
It's like I had to wait for quantum physics to catch up and the internet to catch up.

654
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:29,000
I searched for years.

655
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:31,360
I used to have stacks of books next to my bed.

656
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:35,840
I was reading, you know, Stephen Hawking time, the physics books, why is there no time on

657
00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:36,840
the other side?

658
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:38,960
Somebody please explain these experiences.

659
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:40,240
What is that grid?

660
00:34:40,240 --> 00:34:43,080
And then eventually I said, okay, that's it.

661
00:34:43,080 --> 00:34:46,040
I'm just going to give up on this and let it be.

662
00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:48,040
I'm sure you have questions by now.

663
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:49,960
Oh, this is just really cool.

664
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:51,720
It's been fun to listen to.

665
00:34:51,720 --> 00:34:53,240
What do you make of all this?

666
00:34:53,240 --> 00:34:58,800
I mean, really, how did this settle with you and change you internally?

667
00:34:58,800 --> 00:34:59,800
Right.

668
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:00,800
So exactly.

669
00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:03,160
So it's not what happens to you.

670
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:07,520
It's what happens inside of you as a result of what happens to you.

671
00:35:07,520 --> 00:35:12,040
People who are familiar with Gabor Mate and his trauma healing have heard him say that,

672
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:18,240
but it applies so well to people who have near-death experiences because when we listen

673
00:35:18,240 --> 00:35:24,760
to somebody's experience, we are looking for confirmation or knowing that, you know, life

674
00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:28,040
goes on, our loved ones in the spirit world are okay.

675
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:30,400
You're going to be okay when you pass on.

676
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:35,040
But we, you know, we're kind of stuck in that phase and we're fascinated by these stories

677
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:38,360
because that's where we are in our conscious evolution right now.

678
00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:43,480
But then when you look at what happens to these people as a result of those experiences,

679
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:48,440
even for me, it was a complete life transformation and that's why I always joke they saved me

680
00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:50,160
too quickly the first time.

681
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:53,400
And so they had to give me a second near-death experience so they could put me on the right

682
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:55,320
track for this life.

683
00:35:55,320 --> 00:36:00,320
Growing up in Sweden where my father was a physician and my mom was a hospital floor

684
00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:05,560
administrator, I was always surrounded by medicine and ever as long back as I can remember, I

685
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:07,840
wanted to be a doctor, just like my dad.

686
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:08,840
I want to be a doctor.

687
00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:14,120
But back then, you know, I was born in 1958, so I was raised in the 1960s.

688
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:18,640
Typically back then the women became nurses and the men became doctors.

689
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:21,120
And my dad would always say, you know, be a nurse, be a nurse.

690
00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,600
It doesn't take as long.

691
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:25,240
And I ended up not going that route.

692
00:36:25,240 --> 00:36:27,040
It was a business major, computer science major.

693
00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:31,720
I was a programmer and systems analyst of working for IBM in my, you know, after college in

694
00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:32,800
the United States.

695
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,480
So I went with that very logical route.

696
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:40,000
So here I am, you know, after these experiences and always feel like the spirit world said,

697
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,000
all right, you're on the wrong track.

698
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,160
We got to put you back on the healing track.

699
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,120
That's what you incarnated to be.

700
00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:47,760
That's what you wanted to be as a child.

701
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:50,920
But then, you know, life sometimes takes you in a different direction.

702
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:55,000
I knew I had to be a healer or a doctor.

703
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:58,160
For 12 years now, I have heard the spirit world.

704
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:00,480
The spirit world would come and visit me.

705
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:04,400
So it started the first day after my first near-death experience.

706
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:06,120
I heard my sister-in-law.

707
00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:09,920
And then a year later, my uncle passed away and he came to visit in the middle of the

708
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:14,840
night and I figured my mom was going to call me from Sweden the next day and say, hey,

709
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:16,440
you know, my brother passed away.

710
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:17,440
Nobody called me.

711
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:18,840
So I said, wow, this is so strange.

712
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:19,840
I know he was here.

713
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,320
He said, you know, just letting you know that passed on.

714
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:28,720
Another day goes by and then finally this was the night like Sunday to Monday, finally

715
00:37:28,720 --> 00:37:30,480
on Wednesday, my mom calls.

716
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:31,960
You know, she does her usual chit chat.

717
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:33,440
How is things going?

718
00:37:33,440 --> 00:37:36,640
And then she says, I have something tragic to share with you.

719
00:37:36,640 --> 00:37:41,640
And I said, I know your brother passed away, you know, two days ago and it was just dead

720
00:37:41,640 --> 00:37:42,640
silence.

721
00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:44,760
And I said, how did you know?

722
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:46,280
And I said, he was here.

723
00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:53,040
You know, he came and told me my mom's response at that point was, you're just like your grandma,

724
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:58,280
just like her mother, because she also knew when people passed away.

725
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:05,080
And so that's how it started, but the spirit world would tell me all these things.

726
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:06,760
So my kids were a little older.

727
00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:10,120
So it was fun to tell the things that you're very, you know, that are verifiable.

728
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:13,800
So one morning I woke up and I had three images.

729
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:18,680
The first image was of our van and it was a black scratch on the side of the door.

730
00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:22,440
And the second image is I see two of my kids in the car, my middle son in the front seat,

731
00:38:22,440 --> 00:38:23,960
my daughter in the back seat.

732
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:30,120
And then the third image is me leaving a note on the windshield of a black sedan car, but

733
00:38:30,120 --> 00:38:31,760
I don't see any people.

734
00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:36,120
So I tell my kids, we live in the San Francisco Bay area in California and they go to school

735
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:37,760
in the city.

736
00:38:37,760 --> 00:38:39,200
So I had to drive them to the city.

737
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:41,740
They were at the San Francisco Ballet School.

738
00:38:41,740 --> 00:38:45,480
And that's like the big book to do is like a training for the Olympics kind of thing.

739
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,560
They train them six days a week.

740
00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:51,680
So I'm driving them to the city because they're too young to take the subway by themselves

741
00:38:51,680 --> 00:38:52,680
at that age.

742
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:55,080
And so I tell my kids, this is what I saw.

743
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:57,320
And we go through all the intersections.

744
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,680
So we know the scratch is on the right hand side of the door.

745
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:01,960
It's the sliding door on the van.

746
00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:03,880
So we must be hit oncoming traffic.

747
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:05,680
We're turning left oncoming traffic.

748
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:07,480
It's the only way we can get hit.

749
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:12,040
Two weeks go by and we figure out there's only one intersection in the city because a lot

750
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,320
of the streets in San Francisco are one way.

751
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:16,440
We come across the bridge into San Francisco.

752
00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:17,760
We get off the freeway.

753
00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:19,120
We come down to the light.

754
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:20,640
We jog left.

755
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:22,320
Only street that has oncoming traffic.

756
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:26,960
So every day for two weeks, my kids' noses are pressed up against their window saying,

757
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:28,560
Mom, the coast is clear.

758
00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:30,680
There's no cars coming because they're concerned too.

759
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:32,520
They're going to be in this accident, right?

760
00:39:32,520 --> 00:39:34,680
Mom saw the scratch on the car.

761
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:36,880
So two weeks go by, nothing.

762
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:41,240
Then we're in Walnut Creek, East Bay, San Francisco, and at the bookstore.

763
00:39:41,240 --> 00:39:44,600
We come out of the bookstore and there's this big truck in the way.

764
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:48,720
He's offloading all these boxes and I'm trying to get on the street.

765
00:39:48,720 --> 00:39:55,840
And as I'm turning right onto the street, the right part of my car scrapes the car that's

766
00:39:55,840 --> 00:39:59,400
parked and it's a black sedan car.

767
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:02,040
So now I know, right?

768
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:03,040
This is the scratch.

769
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:05,080
So I get out of my car and walk around the car.

770
00:40:05,080 --> 00:40:10,880
I see the black scratch and I just raise my hands to the sky and just laugh.

771
00:40:10,880 --> 00:40:14,920
I'm sure the people who saw me must have thought this woman is absolutely nuts.

772
00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:17,440
Wouldn't be the first time you look crazy.

773
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:18,440
Right?

774
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:21,360
So here I am, leaving the note on the black sedan car.

775
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:26,440
So all these things were happening and I started hearing things, seeing things, knowing things,

776
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:28,280
hearing the spirit world.

777
00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:33,760
And after 12 years of this and writing things down, because I thought, this is just a deja

778
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:34,760
vu.

779
00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:35,760
I'm so skeptical.

780
00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:37,200
I'm so scientific.

781
00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:42,360
And I needed proof over and over again that what I was experiencing was real and it wasn't

782
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:44,040
coming from my brain.

783
00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:48,320
And so I would, anything that happened or I saw things in a dream or in a meditation,

784
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:52,840
or I would just know things, I would write it down because it was a way for me to verify

785
00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:54,240
that information.

786
00:40:54,240 --> 00:40:59,960
So after 12 years of this, I am thinking, okay, I need to go back to work soon, but I

787
00:40:59,960 --> 00:41:00,960
can't go back to programming.

788
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:03,040
I want to do something in healing.

789
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:08,560
So I come across this medical school on the internet, naturopathic medical school.

790
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:10,880
And then I realized it's a real medical school.

791
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:13,320
It wasn't just something you could do in a year.

792
00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:15,600
I was like, four years of medical school.

793
00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:17,920
There's not even any guarantee I'm going to get in.

794
00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:22,280
I'm going to have to take all the pre-rex, the chemistry, the bio, the physics.

795
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:25,400
And then, you know, after finishing all of that, there's no guarantee they're going to

796
00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:27,840
accept me because I'm going to be so much older.

797
00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:30,160
Well, I closed the computer, walked to the kitchen.

798
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:34,840
Now my kids are old enough to there in San Francisco, you know, they're taking the subway.

799
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:38,320
And as I'm walking to the kitchen, the spirit world drops in on me.

800
00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:42,640
But now it's been 12 years of me listening to the spirit world and every message I have

801
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:45,080
received in 12 years have been accurate.

802
00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:48,800
So at this point, I'm trusting what I'm receiving.

803
00:41:48,800 --> 00:41:52,480
So the spirit world drops in and says, you have to go to naturopathic medical school.

804
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,280
You have to be a doctor.

805
00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:59,120
And they said, you have to combine East and West, which is like combining all the new.

806
00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:04,640
They said, you have to write two books, no wait, three.

807
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:06,640
And you have to bring messages to people.

808
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:09,760
And I'm like, what am I supposed to write about?

809
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:11,200
What are you talking about messages?

810
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:12,200
What do you mean messages?

811
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:16,920
And the spirit world answer was just when the time is right, we will let you know.

812
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:22,160
For now, just going on a roll in the prereqs, literally in two weeks, I was already taking

813
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:23,920
my pre-reqs.

814
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:27,360
And because I was a business and computer science major as an undergraduate, I didn't

815
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:32,080
have any of the like high school advanced placement biology and all that.

816
00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:36,560
I had to start with advanced placement high school biology at the community college and

817
00:42:36,560 --> 00:42:41,240
then get to the prereqs of biology, chemistry, organic chemistry and physics.

818
00:42:41,240 --> 00:42:43,160
So I had to take all those classes.

819
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:47,280
And so that is how I ended up on, you know, going to medical school and I went to, I was

820
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:51,320
accepted and went into medical school at the age of 54.

821
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:52,320
Congratulations.

822
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:58,160
So everybody out there, it's a never too late to transform your life and follow and follow

823
00:42:58,160 --> 00:42:59,360
that calling.

824
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:05,760
But that message of you're to write two books, no wait, three, I have gotten that exact message

825
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:12,520
with that exact phrasing four times from two professional mediums at Arthur Fiender College

826
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:14,960
in England, which is the top mediums in the world.

827
00:43:14,960 --> 00:43:18,880
And two other times, one from a student and one from a friend who is who I met, who was

828
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:20,320
also a medium.

829
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:22,320
And the message is always the same.

830
00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:24,920
You're to write two books, no wait, three.

831
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:25,920
That's so interesting.

832
00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:30,600
So I'm always saying, no, why is that, that extra one is going to be different, I feel,

833
00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:31,640
than the first two.

834
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:37,120
So I've written my first book, which is all about helping people transform their life

835
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:42,200
and follow their own calling and sharing a lot of my own stories of how the mediumship

836
00:43:42,200 --> 00:43:47,680
developed and the spirituality developed for me to help people develop their own spirituality.

837
00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:48,680
Yeah.

838
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:49,680
So let's do this.

839
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:53,960
We're going to spend some time talking about some of those spiritual things, or as I like

840
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:58,760
to call them spiritual gifts, because a lot of people after their NDEs have some kind

841
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:02,760
of spiritual gift or gifts that they did not have before.

842
00:44:02,760 --> 00:44:06,240
Before we move on to that though, you had been an atheist.

843
00:44:06,240 --> 00:44:08,040
Are you still an atheist?

844
00:44:08,040 --> 00:44:10,240
How has this changed your belief?

845
00:44:10,240 --> 00:44:13,440
You obviously believe there's something after this life.

846
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:16,680
My belief now, so we are eternal beings.

847
00:44:16,680 --> 00:44:18,320
We don't, you know, we don't die.

848
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:23,000
The body dies just like if you're in a car crash, your car died, you go get another new

849
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:24,000
car.

850
00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:26,000
Your body dies, you come back in a new body.

851
00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:32,720
So it's that reincarnation and the spirit world, you know, when we leave this body,

852
00:44:32,720 --> 00:44:34,440
we go on to the spirit world.

853
00:44:34,440 --> 00:44:41,080
And I think eventually we reincarnated, we come back in another body, in another life.

854
00:44:41,080 --> 00:44:46,200
My beliefs now is of course, in the spirit world, we are spiritual beings.

855
00:44:46,200 --> 00:44:52,040
And in divine source, there is something out there that is of greater consciousness than

856
00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:55,240
we are, and we are created in that liking.

857
00:44:55,240 --> 00:44:59,040
Okay, I'm going to ask you to speculate on something.

858
00:44:59,040 --> 00:45:03,720
You mentioned earlier that you were not given a choice on whether to go back or not.

859
00:45:03,720 --> 00:45:05,880
You were just told you're going back.

860
00:45:05,880 --> 00:45:08,080
Some people do have a choice.

861
00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:13,080
So in your opinion, why do you think some have a choice and some don't?

862
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:18,000
I think it's just the incarnation that, you know, that, because I've heard, I met somebody

863
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:24,120
once at like a IAINTS meeting, International Association for Neodust studies.

864
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:26,600
And he said he had three outs.

865
00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:28,560
He was told that he had three outs.

866
00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:30,440
And this was one of his outs.

867
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:32,600
And he could have stayed if he wanted to.

868
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:34,520
It's like he had a choice.

869
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:37,440
You can go back and you can have this life and I'll look at all the fun things that are

870
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,760
going to happen where you can stay if you want.

871
00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:41,280
This is one of your outs.

872
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:42,680
I didn't have a choice.

873
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:47,160
I feel like to a certain extent, we write a little movie script for what we're here to

874
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:48,680
experience.

875
00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:52,560
And they were like, you can't stay because you have way too much to fulfill in this

876
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:53,560
life.

877
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:56,360
You can't go back and fulfill your incarnation.

878
00:45:56,360 --> 00:46:02,200
So I feel like there is some sort of soul contract that we have about our journey here

879
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:07,480
on earth, because a lot of things that happen to us are in our astrological charts.

880
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:08,480
Right?

881
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:11,760
We can see things, major things that are happening in those charts.

882
00:46:11,760 --> 00:46:16,960
So that's almost like your movie script in a certain sense.

883
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:21,480
Believe it or not, there is a lot, lot more to come from Dr. Lottie.

884
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:25,400
But we're going to put that in a part two of this episode and release that later this

885
00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:26,400
week.

886
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:29,320
So I hope you'll come back and listen to the rest.

887
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:34,400
We're going to find out about her spiritual gifts, why her watches didn't work for 12

888
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:37,680
years, and a whole lot more until then.

889
00:46:37,680 --> 00:47:00,080
I wish you everything good that you're looking for in this life and the next.