Transcript
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From the time that they pronounced me deaf was a good 45 minutes.
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They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped.
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And I could see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realize that was actually my
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physical body because I was somewhere else.
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The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't
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anything else to be felt.
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I was greeted by people I'd known in the past.
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I'm back home again.
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Incredibly safe and felt at home.
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Welcome to Round Trip Death, everybody, and welcome to our very special guest today,
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Felice DiMartino.
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How are you?
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I am wonderful, happy to be here.
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Thank you.
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Good.
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Felice is a barrel of energy.
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We are going to have fun today.
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And I'm going to tell you, for our listeners, you're going to find out what it's like.
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As a pedestrian to get hit by a pickup truck that's going 30 miles an hour or so.
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So with that in mind of what's to come, would you mind just taking one minute and tell us
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a little bit about you so we can get to know you, Felice?
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Sure.
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So I am a mom.
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I have two adult daughters.
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In their early 30s, I am a former Montessori educator in a Montessori school and consulting
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for training centers.
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And I have a loving, wonderful family that I am extremely, extremely grateful for.
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And all the ways that I identified myself in my before, before the experience, has all
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shifted, right?
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It's been a really big identity reboot.
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Do you have any grandkids?
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I do not have grandkids yet.
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Get those girls going.
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Well, let me tell you, personally, not that it's up to me.
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I'm not ready.
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Like I know, again, if I, it's not, it's not up to me, but I have a lot to do and be
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an express before I want to be a hands-on full-on brand mom.
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So there's that.
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You can do both.
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Don't worry about it.
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All right.
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I want to jump in and find out, let's go back to this day, December 2nd, 2015.
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Correct.
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What was going on this day that led up to this horrific accident?
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Well, interesting.
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You should ask Eric, because leading up to this accident, incident opportunity, I had
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just gone through a few years, about 18 months.
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A lot of things happen at once.
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And the proverbial crap hit the fan all at one time.
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I call it resiliency bootcamp.
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And it was a series of events.
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Never had an affair, house fire, empty nester, accident.
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I was in Avid Ski or major surgery on my knee, theft of all my jewelry, not in this order,
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right?
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First came the theft of all my jewelry, everything I had owned, family heirloons, except what
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I was wearing.
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So empty nest that then the house had a flood on the bottom once the top was gutted and how
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to be redone then the bottom had a flood.
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So all of this stuff happened.
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I took a leave of absence from work where I was teaching.
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Just as I had gotten on my feet again was when the incident happened.
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And prior that I had this call and I knew that if all the stuff that I had just gone
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through could be helpful, if I could use it in service for others to help in any way,
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it took some of the edge and the trauma off of what had just occurred.
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So I was interested in pursuing that track and I was also being called to either do that
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or expand upon what I was doing in Montessori education.
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And I was kind of frozen.
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I wasn't doing either one of those things.
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And then the universe gave me the big dope slap and literally knocked me off my feet
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with this truck.
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So were you in a crosswalk?
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How in the world did this happen?
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So I had left work and I was walking to my car which was parked off campus.
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And there's a light with a busy intersection that I had across and I waited for the light
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to give me the right of way to cross.
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I had been a little distracted because I was engaging with someone that I knew was not
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in my best interest to be engaging with.
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And I, it was on the phone as I was walking to the crosswalk.
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So I put my phone away and I was still distracted thinking about it.
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And still though I waited for the light to give me the right of way to cross.
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The cars had stopped and about three quarters of the way across the crosswalk, a big pickup
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truck came up from behind me and made a left hand turn and struck the right side of my
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body about, like I said, three quarters of the way across.
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And what happened was she had sped up to avoid an oncoming car.
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So she kind of gunned it to make the left hand turn and hit me going about 30 plus miles
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an hour.
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Sounds like she was focused on that other oncoming car.
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Exactly.
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Instead of her focus, yeah, being on you.
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Exactly.
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And you know, it was dusk.
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It was kind of rainy out and yeah, she didn't see me and hit me in the crosswalk.
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Okay.
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So your body went flying.
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Yes, my body went flying.
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Is there a point where you felt like you left your body?
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Yes.
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So what happened was I whipped my head around to the right and this came to me after this,
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this, this, this very viscerally, this memory, this visceral memory came up after about how
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I whipped my head to the right, although times felt like it stopped.
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So that moment was elongated that I whipped my head to the right and I made eye contact
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very briefly with this pair of eyes that was in complete terror across the truck because
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it was to the top of my nose, right, where my vision was across the hood of the car.
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And I had a sense of falling and as that sense of falling was occurring, I was completely
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popped out of my body and I was looking down at the scene and at that point I could see
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my body lying in the road, motionless, and there was a sense of disorientation because
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I was fully existing at an awareness yet the, the, my body was laying on the ground.
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So I wasn't in the body and there was some disorientation until I got my bearing straight
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and then there was a question about being, am I going to be able to go back there into
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that body?
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And there was a very strong pull and draw because of all that I had just gone through
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to come back to be back in the body for my kids, right?
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I mean, having just gone through this resiliency boot camp and I understood that I would be
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able to go back there and what happened was I was, so I was looking down at the scene,
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I could hear what was going on.
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I could feel the people that were gathered around the woman who hit me and a few other
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bystanders.
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I could see in a multi-directional view the woman, a woman going to the cross street to
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stop traffic.
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So I had this bird's eye view of what was going on and I also had a sense that it was
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this limitless space yet there was like a spotlight was going on in this assessing period.
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Wow.
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Yeah.
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Did you feel like, I'm having a hard time putting this question together because I'm
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envisioning this whole thing happening, right?
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And you are up in the sky looking down on the whole scene.
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Was there a point where you went someplace else?
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Yes.
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Let's talk about that.
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Okay, so it looked like my body was in one piece.
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From that vantage point, there wasn't an awareness of what was going on internally in the body,
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which was a lot, multiple fractures, internal bleeding, organ swelling and damage, a cracked
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skull and brain, massive traumatic brain injury.
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I couldn't see the blood that was internally or coming from my skull.
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And as my body, it felt like the physical form was slowly losing vitality, right?
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It was shutting down and these organs were slowly bleeding out.
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I was bleeding out from my pelvis.
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And I had the experience in the state I was in of lifting higher and higher and higher
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above the scene.
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And that part of me that was existing was being more energized.
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So that's where all of the, I want to say life force, not life in a body, but that's
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where all of the energy was being infused to the state that I was existing as the body
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was shutting down.
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It's interesting that you felt, although it sounded like you felt sort of at the same
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time, hey, I want to go back to that body.
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Did that last, did that change?
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It wasn't even, I want to go back.
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It was, am I going to be able to go back?
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Okay.
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Much more of a question.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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It was much more of a question of, am I going to be able to go back there to that and exist
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in that form of the body?
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And I understood that I could go back.
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So that comes up a little bit later, right before I came back after I experienced what
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I experienced.
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Yeah.
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It's just interesting that connection.
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And your girls were what?
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Teenagers then?
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Young teenagers?
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They were, no, they were both in college.
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So they were late teens, early twenties.
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But you still felt like they needed you.
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Oh yeah.
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Yeah.
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You felt that connection.
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Yeah.
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That connection.
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And cause I had been doing a lot of healing and they had gone through trauma, witnessing
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their mom going through trauma, right?
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From all that had just happened and really feeling that we were in this healing phase,
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right?
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Or me as a mom really wanting to show up more fully again.
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And I'll get to this, but what happened is before I came back into my body, there are
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different, I'm going to call them vibrational frequencies or dimensions or planes of existence
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that I experienced before I got to this point.
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When I was coming back into the body, there was a sense of urgency that, and again, I'll
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share about this with this presence that was other than my own that was sharing with me.
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If I wanted to go back, I needed to get back.
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Like it was time.
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I had to get back because my body again was bleeding out and there was a lot going on
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internally that it was time.
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I don't know what would have happened if I had chosen or if I didn't go back at that
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moment when the urgency built to, all right, if you're going back, you have to go back
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now.
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Okay.
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Well, go ahead and tell me what happened next as you can remember it.
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So it's very clear and very vivid.
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So there's not really, it's interesting.
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I don't feel like I have to remember it.
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It kind of lives inside of me as this experience.
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And as I was lifting higher and higher above my body, I found myself in this pure blackness.
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And it was an illuminated blackness.
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I say blackness yet it was, it's like, we don't have words for these states or colors.
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So I'm doing it the best that I can.
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But it was blacker than black and it had a sense of being illuminated.
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And in this state, there was simply being.
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There was no worry.
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There was no fear.
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There was no separateness.
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I was simply part of the blackness.
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And I say I and I indicates that there was a separateness yet there wasn't a separateness.
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It was it was simply being a part of this expansive beingness of this illuminated blackness.
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I do not understand what illuminated blackness means.
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I know it's it's it's like it's there's there was a luminosity in the black.
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There was like it was like a shining quality that shown from within it.
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Almost like it would it be kind of like black paint that it's really shiny has a super
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glossy tone to it.
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Sure.
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Sure.
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That great.
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Yes.
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Maybe that's the only thing we can relate to here.
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Yes.
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So.
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Okay.
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Keep going.
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So I was simply in this space merged in with this blackness.
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It was simply being it was like pure presence pure a pure state of being.
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And at some point there was a quality of a of a shift.
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I want to say there's a quality of a it was still a blackness yet it shifted a bit to
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have this quality where it felt like I was floating in a cocoon and I was aware on the
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periphery that there were others like me floating in cocoons and they were other than me yet
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we were all had a quality that we shared.
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We were all made up of similar material and in that state there was an understanding that
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this was a waiting place of sorts.
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And as I was floating there was no worry.
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There was no doubt.
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There was no fear.
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There was no again it was a it was a quality of simply being yet there was an understanding
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that there's was a waiting for something and an energy what we call thought.
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I'm going to call it an energy packet started to come up from within that space of well
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if this is a waiting place what and what is the waiting for like what are we waiting for
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and as that built up I was immediately met with what I was waiting for and then I was
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in this place and and I say that that's the seed of the law of attraction right because
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there's no density there's no resistance there's no the ego questioning there's no fear about
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what it is we're waiting for it's completely met.
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Just like the second you have a thought or this energy packet of thought culminates you're
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instantly met with that which it is that you were having the thought the wondering about
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it.
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Do you have any questions before I go on.
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Yeah I do have one question.
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What do you make of the cocoon.
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I don't know that I've heard that that description from somebody before was it like a protective
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layer around you was it what was mobilizing you from one place to another what do you
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think.
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It felt like it was it almost feels like it was a membrane around me that was I went
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from this sense of being fully in communion with everything in the blackness to being
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having a sense of being a form that was I don't want to say individualized yet that
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was distinct so it kind of kept this distinction from for me and then the others that were
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floating that I was aware of the periphery.
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I haven't really thought about it in those terms before or had that question it's more
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of a sense so practicing giving words to it is really helpful thank you for that question
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and again there was no it was it was there was no fear there was no worry there was no
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doubting it was all simply being it's almost like when you're a newborn baby in a pure
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state so I hope that answers the question.
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It's as well as you can I can tell.
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Thank you.
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Okay what happened next.
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So as that culminated the wondering of what am I waiting for I was immediately met with
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this presence I'm going to say effulgence of pure light and there was a form that was
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made up of the light yet wasn't necessarily distinct from it in terms of oh there was
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a person or a it was there was like a subtle shape but it was made from the form that's
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the only way I can give words words to it and I knew that this presence that was made
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up of the light was other than my own yet I was being in communion with that presence
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who was there to share information for me to show me things to was there purely for me
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and with me and in that state that presence had neither was neither male nor female it
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has qualities this this this energy being had qualities that we would attribute to both
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male and female it was completely like I said completely there for me with me to answer
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questions and to show me things and it was as if I and I use this analogy a lot because
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I find it's it's maybe the most relatable if you put your forehead to someone else's
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forehead and you understood and knew in an instant everything about that person that
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soul the soul's journey the human experience past present future about that person through
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the lens of the soul and the eternal part of them all of this information was coming
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to me at work speed and that's another thing this these states and these these this experience
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is timeless there's no time as we know it linear time on the human on the earth plane
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and a lot of information was shared with me in that place about what I had been experienced
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on earth about these deep soul lessons and soul incarnations time after time there's
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these core lessons that we learn through experiences and and I was shown again at light speed all
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of this information and you remember most of this information or just remember that you
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knew it at the time so there are definitely some things that I remember in that state
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and when I came back there are aha moments that that connect in with what I was shown
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in that state and there are things that there was a point where I where I told myself in
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that state and this presence that I would remember everything that was shared with me
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and upon coming back there are things that I know that was shared in some distant memory
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yet I don't have a firm grasp of every detail and it's funny that you say that because lately
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I've been feeling like I want to go into some hypnotherapy to remember because it was so
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profound I want to remember all those details again and I just don't there are a lot of
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details that I do have a deep that I walk with a deep understanding and knowing of experientially
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and then there are things that I that are so foggy I just I don't remember all the details
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must be a little frustrating you know it's interesting I move into the which what's with
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frustration is moving into trust and surrender trust and surrender and all as well so so
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it's really helped me enter into not being frustrated right to remember that what I was
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shown had to do with acceptance surrender compassion grace non-judgment all of those
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things that help one not be frustrated.
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When we spoke earlier you had mentioned that you had a life review is this the point where
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that's coming I don't want to jump too far ahead.
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No that's okay I you know my experience of a life review a life review in these states
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can look different for everyone right for me it was understanding what was going on
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in my life at the time what had led up to that what the nuggets for my soul's evolution
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and growth were and being able to feel and sense what other were going through indirect
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relation to my actions right even the woman who hit me at some point I felt this responsibility
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of I'm sorry please forgive me right because she was in such trauma and horrified right
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so there's this and not in a judgmental way you know when we leave and we're on the other
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side it's not like there's some being who's going to judge us it's more that our soul
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and we get to review how we impacted others and how our lives and our circumstances are
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a direct result of the choices that we've made so any sense of what we would say judgment
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comes from our own self in connection with a part of us that's in connection to that
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higher self does that make sense.
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Yeah and the more that I learn about life reviews from talking to people about theirs
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is it yeah it's not meant to be a judgment session it's meant to be a learning session
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can you think of one thing that you learned from it?
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Yes I learned I learned that forgiveness so I've heard I heard three major things before
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I came back and in that state and one of this is that I had the experience of all is truly
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well and that there are pillars of all is truly well and at the time that I got hit
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I was engaging with this person who had had an affair right there was this betrayal and
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I understood about the different layers and levels of forgiveness that he was just being
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who he was being in his own soul's learning and growth and evolution and I was able to
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come back when I came back and have a deeper sense of compassion and recognize that and
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I don't know if this is answering the question that as souls we're connected we exist on
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multiple planes of existence right some are through the felt senses and some are through
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senses that many people don't have access to because they haven't been cultivated so
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on a soul level you can be connected with someone and you can have compassion I'm getting
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kind of off tangent but you can have compassion and forgiveness and understanding and give
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them grace in their humaneness so I think I was shown and understood about different
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deeper levels of forgiveness including self forgiveness and the ways that we're so hard
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on ourselves and hold ourselves to standards that are dictated by society and culture that
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we live in forgiveness is one of the toughest things for us to do in this life did you learn
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some kind of a secret of how we can more easily or more fully forgive others yeah so what
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I was shown is that you know I was a person that that that walked around with not a lot
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of boundaries right I would see the essence of who someone truly is and treat a person
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as their potential rather than who they were being and in turn then we get physically
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mentally emotionally we suffer forgiveness ties into expectations the expectations we
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have of others and of ourselves and what I was able to understand deeply is that and
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it ties in with boundaries is that you can acknowledge the essence of who someone truly
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is and pay attention to who they're being and have boundaries especially when you're
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not safe in any one of those realms forgiveness it's like if we can do that we're then in
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less situations where forgiveness is number one called up to be looked at I was shown
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that forgiveness really is and truly starts with oneself for example oftentimes we know
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what we know that we know that we know and we don't pay attention to what we know and
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then we move to situations and circumstances where maybe we feel like we have to forgive
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ourselves for not listening to that inner nudge and what we know so so the practice
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of of listening to oneself and your body and your your own indications creates less circumstances
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it just it creates more alignment with acceptance of self I don't know if this is making sense
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or if I'm getting off on tangents there are layers to forgiveness there are layers and
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levels to forgiveness giving ourselves clock time you know like there's a lot of things
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about forgiveness and and oh po no po no right forgiving oneself forgiving others asking for
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forgiveness and to be gentle it's you know our body has a clock time and to not be hard
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on ourselves for going through the different stages and levels of forgiveness time does
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its thing time earth time linear time clock time for the body does its thing and as time
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goes the body is able to discharge and come into more of a neutral state where forgiveness
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is then possible because we're not as triggered I know this is a long talk around I hope this
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is making sense for people yeah I wanted one sentence that would just wave a magic one
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and so I could go get I want to forgive this one person darn it doesn't it doesn't happen
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as easy as I want it to her as fast as I want to I want to forgive this person today but
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I have these hard feelings still that I have to get over how about this how is this for
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me what is this showing me what can I do with this how can I grow from this asking yourself
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those those questions rather than allows us to open up to more of a space of forgiveness
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because everyone is our teacher relationships are our teacher so when we can shift from
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a victim which often goes hand in hand with forgiveness right because if you're feeling
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like a victim at the hands of someone else then there's a reason is created to forgive
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that person so I feel like it's clock time for the body and it's also moving from a
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victim mindset like this was done to me and I'm not saying whether you believe things
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are done to you or for you I'm not getting to that what I'm saying is we have a choice
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to say how is this for me and then we can move more easily into forgiveness is that
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helpful oh yeah I'm just I'm a huge believer in it like forgive as fast as I can that's
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why I just wish I were even better at it something I've tried to cultivate and develop over the
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years but this is about you let's keep going with your experience and I realize this may
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not be a completely linear thing so when I say tell me what happened next tell me tell
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me what else happened so I was in this state all of this information was being uploaded
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downloaded I understood the nature of the ego mind the nature of being human what was
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going on in my life at the time purse on a personal level and also how it is to be an
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embodied expression on the hue for all humans of of the love of that source energy of being
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in alignment with the voice of our soul so so what was shared with me was related to
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my path in particular and in general about the humans and human being as I'll call it
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and being incarnate in a body and at some point there was an urgency to get back into
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the body there was an urgency of if you're going back you have to go back now and that
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urgency started to build one of the last things that I heard was when you go back it's time
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to live big I heard it loud as and clear as we're talking now when you go back it's time
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to live big and I knew in all different ways what that meant it's time to live big and
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I said to this this presence right before I started to have this sense of descending
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down who are you and I heard I am you and then I was left with me I was left with the
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sense of me starting to incarnate again into this body face to face with that I am presence
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that soul spark of divinity that is also me and there was a sense of descending into
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the body I also at some point around this time heard and could see as I got lower and
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lower there were EMTs over me and they were talking and I saw my mouth moving but I wasn't
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there I was witnessing and hearing with senses that are others than the site and hearing
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there are like amplified senses and I felt this sense of being squeezed it's like I was
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existing as this expanse and also I was like a genie being squeezed into a bottle and there
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was this density and this weightedness at the same time as I would it's like I was existing
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in both places I was out of my body completely expansive aware of oh there are sirens oh
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like oh that's for me that's for me as that body but I was existing as a me outside of
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my body and this also this sense of being squeezed in and I heard yelping sounds from
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the physical form the next thing is that I was in an ambulance and I was above looking
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I was on the top on the ceiling of the ambulance looking down I could see there was an EMT
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at my head hold squeeze in my head together because there was a profuse amount of blood
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and there was they were doing what whatever EMTs do in the ambulance right and there was
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someone talking to me and I was popping in and out and also existing in both places at
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one time.
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You were half dead half alive basically.
403
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Yeah and and again I couldn't see what was happening internally so when I came in to
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fully back online I won't say online but I was still existing outside for so long I
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was in a trauma unit they took me to a further hospital because it had a level one trauma
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unit and there was organized chaos going on around me there was one nurse that I remember
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was had an energy had this very soft warm motherly nourishing nurturing energy otherwise
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they were like it was frantic right here comes this woman who's been hit by this truck so
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that's what happened.
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That's it is there anything that you left out while you felt like you were out of your
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body was there anything else that happened or that was communicated to you or that you
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saw.
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I was able to see understand feel know with a capital K no in a multi sensory multi understanding
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way that all fit together all of the information that was being imparted all of what it's time
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to live big meant all of what my soul was experiencing again on earth and what there
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was to learn from that it was all done like it's like when you take a rubik's cube and
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you see all the different squares on the rubik's cube right it's like it was seen from senses
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and felt and understood and activated and from senses that we don't have names for even
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beyond the all the Claire's right there boy and all of those it was like senses and colors
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and planes that we just don't have words for so yeah and my and the biggest thing is for
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me is coming back is really integrating I really learned a lot about actually being embodied
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and grounded on the earth in a body and our bodies are these amazing tools of information
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and we have wisdom encoded in our bodies and that we don't need to have a near death experience
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to access expanded states of awareness to access deep soul rememberings and deep soul
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knowings that children are born with children come into it until they grow up and things
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happen right is that we can return to that state and you feel like that is us remembering
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what things were like before we came here to earth and we're born or is some of that
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genetics from our ancestors that is passed down what do you think that is both both
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okay that makes sense yeah both and you know in ancient times when I came back there was
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a lot of yes my body had a heel because there's a lot of trauma I had to walk and learn to
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walk again and talk again and I was in rehab and I had visiting nurses there's a lot going
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on and I felt so blessed by this experience and I had a very hard time knowing where my
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body began and where other where other energy began it was like walking as this just big
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energy field and so I took a lot of trainings and courses and certifications to be able
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to harness all of this energy like what do we do what I do with this right how can I
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use it of service and services huge when I was told all is truly well there were the
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pillars of all is truly well that I was shown which are gratitude faith surrender compassion
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service love I'm sure there's more I was shown a lot about intention so there's a lot of
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different things that we didn't have to talk about because I went on and on forgiveness
440
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well we'll come back to some of this I have one more question about the NDE itself because
441
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you talked a lot about this being and and I believe your words were that you you learned
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that the being was you is that exactly what it was or was the being separate but you were
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learning from the being there was a there was a presence that was other than my own
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yet that when we merge we could merge together for this presence to share information with
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me and I came back and I said who are you and this presence said I am you and then
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I was left almost looking at myself it's a part of and we all have this it's a part
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of my higher self that eternal place within that is in communion with the great eternal
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00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:44,840
source so it was that is that more clear it was like the spark of divine it was it was
449
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:51,760
a spark of the divine right and that we are all co-creators this presence was showing me
450
00:38:51,760 --> 00:39:00,800
how our intentions how our co-creations we are all have this ability to be co-creators
451
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:08,720
and this presence was at a vibrational frequency that some may call the angelic realm some may
452
00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:18,600
call for me it was a very pure crystalline diamond like this pure pure pure pure light
453
00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:27,400
energy so this presence existed out of vibrational frequency that also exists within me it exists
454
00:39:27,400 --> 00:39:34,640
within all of us yeah we're all connected yet this presence as you call it you've called
455
00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:38,880
it a being and a presence and a couple other things I'm just trying to figure this out
456
00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:44,040
just a little bit more a lot of people use the term guide or spirit guide did you feel
457
00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:50,920
like this presence was a guide for you yes I don't you know it's funny like it when I
458
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:55,760
say what is your name I mean I've heard I've been in communion and in communication with
459
00:39:55,760 --> 00:40:04,960
these realms of light and this these frequencies and the name isn't as important as the essence
460
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:11,720
and as the the frequency itself so some people would call it an angel some people would give
461
00:40:11,720 --> 00:40:18,200
it the name you know a light being some people it was a very high presence and it was very
462
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:25,600
familiar to me it knew me and I knew it okay let's talk about what's going on now for just
463
00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:29,760
a minute before we move on about what's going on with your body down here laying in the
464
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:34,800
street paramedics come we already heard about the ambulance a little bit do you have an
465
00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:40,120
idea of do you know if your heart actually stopped not that that would make this any
466
00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:47,120
less real I'm just curious yeah I don't I didn't have paddles on my heart what I was
467
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:55,600
able to see understand no feel is that the physical organism was shutting down and it's
468
00:40:55,600 --> 00:41:00,720
and I've used this analogy it's like a tea kettle right when you have a tea kettle and
469
00:41:00,720 --> 00:41:05,440
you put it on and the water starts to evaporate it's like the water was the body starting
470
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:11,600
to evaporate and the steam was starting to rise as the body was starting to shut down
471
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:19,440
like the steam being the state I was existing in yeah that makes sense and and if you didn't
472
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:24,680
get back in this certain amount of time it was just going to be too late your body would
473
00:41:24,680 --> 00:41:31,480
be too far gone yes there is a sense of you need to get back like it if you're going back
474
00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:36,480
you're going back you have to go back now if you want to go back yeah okay alright let's
475
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:41,520
get back to where we were things that you were learning from all of this let's let's
476
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:47,840
talk about some more of those you mentioned all is truly well and some of those things
477
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:52,640
how about living big yes you said you knew exactly what that meant I don't know what
478
00:41:52,640 --> 00:41:58,320
it meant for you what did it mean for you so I was not living at the in that moment
479
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:05,720
it's like when we play small out of fear out of excuses out of our egos drive to keep us
480
00:42:05,720 --> 00:42:15,560
safe and comfortable I was having these deep inner soul nudges and callings yet I wasn't
481
00:42:15,560 --> 00:42:21,560
doing any of them I wasn't listening so you know living big it could be yes it could be
482
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:28,200
you go on you you have this big dream and go for it it could also mean your soul is
483
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:34,240
calling you to eat a certain way it's living in alignment with your truth and with that
484
00:42:34,240 --> 00:42:39,640
inner knowing right acknowledge that all the reasons and all the excuses and all of the
485
00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:46,720
this that and the other thing come in the way and finding ways to live in alignment with
486
00:42:46,720 --> 00:42:52,160
the voice of the soul so there's that and there's also I don't want to I want to be
487
00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:57,160
very careful that this doesn't come across as a spiritual bypass kind of thing because
488
00:42:57,160 --> 00:43:03,440
there are real traumas that happen in people's lives and that hijacked the primal brain that
489
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:09,120
keep us from doing certain things because in the past it hasn't been safe so it's living
490
00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:14,800
big for me meant paying attention to the voice of the soul and continuing to return back
491
00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:20,320
to that place and being on purpose you know there's a lot of talk about purpose we all
492
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:29,400
have this shared purpose to remember who we truly are as love that we all came here to
493
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:37,840
be embodied expressions of love knowing itself and then we have our individual nuance ways
494
00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:43,800
and paths of how we show up in the world with that physically how long did it take for you
495
00:43:43,800 --> 00:43:49,920
to recover from this. Oh goodness well you know I still have to be kind of aware of certain
496
00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:57,160
things I was in rehab then I had visiting nurses at the house and OTs and PTs that would
497
00:43:57,160 --> 00:44:03,000
come sounds like a few months well at least a few months I mean even you know if I if
498
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:08,120
I'm doing too much yoga I hyper extend my hip flexor but yeah it was it's been it was
499
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:13,640
pretty intensive I'm gonna say for the first two years really you came back from this
500
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:21,120
a different person how did that affect your relationships with people around you well
501
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:26,680
there's a part of me that was you know it's interesting I would have these questionnaires
502
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:30,800
to fill out like what are your preferences what do you like and I was a totally different
503
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:35,320
person when I came back so it took a little while to say well who am I now what are my
504
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:43,040
proclivity is now my family was extremely supportive there are some places that I was
505
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:55,480
almost living my life as I was before yet it no longer fit who I am now with this experience
506
00:44:55,480 --> 00:45:02,840
and this embodied experience of like the ultimate capital art reality I don't I don't know how
507
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:07,480
to answer that question other than to say that my you know what I'm drawn to and the
508
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:11,320
vibrations that I resonate with now are different.
509
00:45:11,320 --> 00:45:16,040
Let me ask you a couple of specifics for example your daughters so they're young adults at
510
00:45:16,040 --> 00:45:23,120
that point was your relationship with them better or worse after this I would say we
511
00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:31,320
always had a very close relationship and better because you know a we're all just happy that
512
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:37,720
I was alive right like they almost lost their mom be you could walk off the street and get
513
00:45:37,720 --> 00:45:43,160
hit by a truck tomorrow literally so living authentically and expressively and from the
514
00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:50,840
heart deepens relationships so although we were always close and supportive there's
515
00:45:50,840 --> 00:45:59,200
no like there's more expression I would say now like this authentic deep conversation
516
00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:06,440
expression right there's no holding back in the expression of love and acknowledgement
517
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:11,560
and understanding and compassion and accepting that everyone's on their spiritual path everyone's
518
00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:18,920
on their soul path and allowing people to be who they are.
519
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:23,280
Thank you for listening to part one of our discussion with Felice part two will be coming
520
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:29,720
out later this week and in it we'll hear more about how her life changed from her NDE and
521
00:46:29,720 --> 00:46:34,840
we'll talk about the shared death experiences she had with her father and grandmother and
522
00:46:34,840 --> 00:46:40,680
a whole bunch more to be alerted as soon as part two is live be sure to follow or subscribe
523
00:46:40,680 --> 00:46:47,040
to this podcast and click on over to roundtripdeath.com to sign up for our newsletter updates until
524
00:46:47,040 --> 00:47:05,920
then I wish you everything good that you're looking for in this life and the next.
